Peter Simple

by Frederick Marryat

“Such a bouncer!!”

“How do you mean? He’s not a very stout man.”

“Bless you, Mr Simple, why, you don’t understand English. I mean that he’s the greatest liar that ever walked a deck. Now, Mr Simple, you know I can spin a yarn occasionally.”

“Yes, that you can; witness the hurricane the other night.”

“Well, Mr Simple, I cannot hold a candle to him. It a’n’t that I might not stretch now and again, just for fun, as far as he can, but, damn it, he’s always on the stretch. In fact, Mr Simple, he never tells the truth except by mistake. He’s as poor as a rat, and has nothing but his pay; yet to believe him, he is worth at least as much as Greenwich Hospital. But you’ll soon find him out, and he’ll sarve to laugh at behind his back, you know, Mr Simple, for that’s no go before his face.”

Captain Kearney made his appearance on board the next day. The men were mustered to receive him, and all the officers were on the quarter-deck “You’ve a fine set of marines here, Captain Falcon,” observed he; “those I left on board of the Minerve were only fit to be hung; and you have a good show of reefers too—those I left in the Minerve were not worth hanging. If you please, I’ll read my commission if you’ll order the men aft.” His commission was read, all hands with their hats off from respect to the authority from which it proceeded. “Now, my lads,” said Captain Kearney, addressing the ship’s company, “I’ve but a few words to say to you. I am appointed to command this ship, and you appear to have a very good character from your late first lieutenant. All I request of you is this: be smart, keep sober, and always tell the truth—that’s enough. Pipe down. Gentlemen,” continued he, addressing the officers, “I trust that we shall be good friends; and I see no reason that it should be otherwise.” He then turned away with a bow, and called his coxswain—“William, you’ll go on board and tell my steward that I have promised to dine with the governor to-day, and that he must come to dress me; and, coxswain, recollect to put the sheepskin mat on the stern gratings of my gig—not the one I used to have when I was on shore in my carriage, but the blue one which was used for the chariot—you know which I mean.” I happened to look Swinburne in the face, who cocked his eye at me, as much as to say—“There he goes.” We afterwards met the officers of the Minerve, who corroborated all that Swinburne had said, although it was quite unnecessary, as we had the captain’s own words every minute to satisfy us of the fact.

Dinner parties were now very numerous, and the hospitality of the island is but too well known. The invitations extended to the midshipmen, and many was the good dinner and kind reception which I had during my stay. There was, however, one thing I had heard so much of, that I was anxious to witness it, which was a dignity ball. But I must enter a little into explanation, or my readers will not understand me. The coloured people of Barbadoes, for reasons best known to themselves, are immoderately proud, and look upon all the negroes who are born on other islands as niggers; they have also an extraordinary idea of their own bravery, although I never heard that it has ever been put to the proof. The free Barbadians are, most of them, very rich, and hold up their heads as they walk with an air quite ridiculous. They ape the manners of the Europeans, at the same time that they appear to consider them as almost their inferiors. Now, a dignity ball is a ball given by the most consequential of their coloured people, and from the amusement and various other reasons, is generally well attended by the officers both on shore and afloat. The price of the tickets of admission was high—I think they were a joe, or eight dollars each.

The governor sent out cards for a grand ball and supper for the ensuing week, and Miss Betsy Austin, a quadroon woman, ascertaining the fact, sent out her cards for the same evening. This was not altogether in rivalry, but for another reason, which was, that she was aware that most of the officers and midshipmen of the ships would obtain permission to go to the governor’s ball, and preferring hers, would slip away and join the party, by which means she insured a full attendance.

On the day of invitation our captain came on board, and told our new first lieutenant (of whom I shall say more hereafter) that the governor insisted, that all his officers should go—that he would take no denial, and therefore, he presumed, go they must; that the fact was, that the governor was a relation of his wife, and under some trifling obligations to him in obtaining for him his present command. He certainly had spoken to the Prime minister, and he thought it not impossible, considering the intimate terms which the minister and he had been on from childhood, that his solicitation might have had some effect; at all events, it was pleasant to find that there was some little gratitude left in this world. After this, of course, every officer went, with the exception of the master, who said that he’d as soon have two round turns in his hawse as go to see people kick their legs about like fools, and that he’d take care of the ship.

The governor’s ball was very splendid; but the ladies were rather sallow, from the effects of the climate. However, there were exceptions, and on the whole it was a very gay affair; but we were all anxious to go to the dignity ball of Miss Betsy Austin. I slipped away with three other midshipmen, and we soon arrived there. A crowd of negroes were outside of the house; but the ball had not yet commenced, from the want of gentlemen, the ball being very correct, nothing under mulatto in colour being admitted. Perhaps I ought to say here, that the progeny of a white and a negro is a mulatto, or half and half—of a white and mulatto, a quadroon, or one quarter black, and of this class the company were chiefly composed. I believe a quadroon and white make the mustee or one eighth black, and the mustee and white the mustafina, or one sixteenth black. After that, they are white washed and considered as Europeans. The pride of colour is very great in the West Indies, and they have as many quarterings as a German prince, in his coat of arms; a quadroon looks down upon a mulatto, while a mulatto looks down upon a sambo, that is, half mulatto half negro, while a sambo in his turn looks down upon a nigger. The quadroons are certainly the handsomest race of the whole: some of the women are really beautiful; their hair is long and perfectly straight, their eyes large and black, their figures perfection, and you can see the colour mantle in their cheeks quite as plainly, and with as much effect, as in those of an European. We found the door of Miss Austin’s house open, and ornamented with orange branches, and on our presenting ourselves were accosted by a mulatto gentleman, who was, we presumed, “usher of the black rod.” His head was well powdered, he was dressed in white jean trowsers, a waistcoat not six inches long, and a half-worn post-captain’s coat on, as a livery. With a low bow, he “took de liberty to trouble de gentlemen for de card for de ball,” which being produced, we were ushered on by him to the ball-room, at the door of which Miss Austin was waiting to receive her company. She made us a low curtsy, observing, “She really happy to see de gentlemen of de ship, but hoped to see de officers also at her dignity.”