When I thought of these and many other conversations which had passed between us, I had no doubt, in my own mind, but that the convicts were correct in their suppositions, and I was disgusted at my own blindness.
“At all events,” said I to myself, after a long cogitation, “if she wants to marry me, she must go to James Town for a parson, and if I once get there, I will contrive, as soon as extra constables are sworn in, to break off the match.” But, seriously, I was in an awkward plight. There was something in that woman that was awful, and I could imagine her revenge to be most deadly. I thought the old Indian squaw to be bad enough, but this new mistress was a thousand times worse. What a hard fate, I thought, was mine, that I should be thus forced to marry against my will, and be separated from her whom I adored. I was a long while turning over the matter in my mind, and at last I resolved that I would make no alteration in my behaviour, but behave to her as before, and that if the affair was precipitated by my mistress, that I would be off to the woods, and take my chance of wild beasts and wild Indians, rather than consent to her wishes. I then went into the cabin, where I found her alone.
“Alexander,” said she (she would know my Christian name, and called me by it), “they say widows court the men, and that they are privileged to do so,” (I turned pale, for I little thought that there was to be an explanation so soon;) “at all events, whether they are or not, I know that a woman in my position cannot well expect a young man in yours to venture without encouragement. Now, Alexander, I have long perceived your feelings and your wishes, and I have only to say that mine are such as yours,” (oh, I wish they were, thought I), “and therefore you have but to ask and to have.”
I was mute with fear and despair, and could not find a reply to make to her.
“Why do you not answer, Alexander? Do you think me too forward?”
“No,” stammered I; “you are very kind, but this is so unexpected—so unlooked for—so unhoped for—I am so overcome.”
Observe, Madam, how strangely the sexes were changed. I was the woman in this instance.
“I should like to consult my friends.”
“Consult your fiddlesticks,” replied she, quickly. “Who have you got to consult? I hope, Alexander,” said she, setting her broad teeth together, “that you are not trifling with me?”
“Indeed, I never should think of trifling with your mistress,” replied I. “I feel much obliged to you for showing such a preference for me.”