3. Goodall, H. Lloyd, Jr. Small Group Communications in Organizations. 2nd ed. Dubuque, IA: Wm. C. Brown, 1990.
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DEALING WITH INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT.
Western World values and ideas of dealing with interpersonal conflict originate in the Code of Hammarabi and the Mosaic Code.
King Solomon in the Bible, following the Ten Commandments of Moses, offers some practical suggestions for dealing with interpersonal conflict.
In Solomon's Book of Proverbs, one of Solomon's main themes is drawing a consistent distinction between the wise man and the foolish man. He characterizes a foolish man as someone who neither asks for advise nor accepts it. He further characterizes the foolish man as someone who is scornful, divisive, quarrelsome, and mocking of other's efforts with cynicism and sarcasm.
Solomon's advise for dealing with scornful people has three steps. The first step is to try counseling with them in private, one on one. Failing that, the second step is to counsel with them again, but with two people, together, advising the third. The final step is to cease relations.
Solomon's three steps are seen today in practical statesmanship. We should remember that today's enemy is tomorrow's friend. Member nations of the United Nations generally apply this same three-step plan that ends in economic sanctions being applied by the United Nations as a whole. Sometimes even ceasing relations with another is not enough and force of arms must be taken to protect weaker neighbors from aggression.
Whether with neighbors or nations, armed conflict is ultimately sorrowful. It is an admission that patient diplomacy and logic have not been successful. It is premeditated violence to protect the weak. Many people, still developing in religious maturity and understanding, feel torment when violence is necessary, because their religious understanding does not extend beyond helping "all" others. It is a question of who is helped and why. Some people too choose to pass from this life as martyrs. Others feel compelled to stay until the end and protect the weak like a shepherd keeping predatory dogs away from the helpless lambs. There may be a time for each course of action.