He walked slowly up and down, and paused again.
"Had it to be done? And thus? Would it not have been better if I had not absolutely denied it? Anyhow, I have not resigned in every case; only, in case it is as I fear. Supposing it is not? What if the young man who has gone through the schooling of a Princess Volinzov, is not one whom our Erna can and should love? What if the Princess is mistaken in this part of the story, or if she has been deceived by the man who may have, had good reasons of his own? What if the whole thing has been a little gentle dallying which Erna has all but forgotten, and I were, with my diplomatic wiles, to fan again into life and light the almost extinguished flame, were to repel her from me and push her into his arms, which will be willing enough to open?"
He stretched out his hands, as though he wished to ward off something. They were all assailing him again now in the broad light of the day, those dread phantoms with which he had wrestled in the awful darkness of the night. Then he had conquered them. Was he to be vanquished now? Was his strength exhausted?
No, no; the worst had yet to come. Though he had persuaded himself that it would be only fair and proper not to be a witness of their first meeting, yet he would have to see them together, perhaps learn at the first glance that they had already made it up, and that the great sacrifice, which the beautiful Princess was making for her darling, had been wholly unnecessary. All the better! In that case the torture of uncertainty would be over all the sooner, and he would at least be spared the humiliation of pushing Quixotic generosity to its utmost limits, and of acting the part of an obtrusive mediator, who clears away all obstacles and ultimately joins the lovers' hands with a "Bless you, my children!"
He sat down at the writing-table to complete his election address. But he could not write, could not think. Pen in hand he sat, hearkening to all the confused sounds which came up and across him from courtyard, garden, and mansion house. The music, after some little pause, is now playing again in long-drawn triumphant strains--representing the salute of the regiment to the house that now guarded its colours; the fair mistress appears on the threshold, surrounded by the other ladies, and the tall and gallant-looking Colonel, hastening up, followed by his officers, bows deferentially and kisses her hand. And lo! from the circle around the mistress of the house, there steps forth another lady, at whose sight the gallant soldier starts. But she smiles, and signals with those mobile orbs of hers--
"Be calm, my friend, be calm! I shall explain all as soon as we are alone for a minute, or, if not all--that being contrary to my habit--as much as you need know. It is a matter concerning these people."
And she points aside to another pair, bowing to each other and presumably renewing--a casual acquaintance, shall we say?
"I hardly know, my gracious Fräulein, whether I still have the honour..."
What a farce it all was!
And what a ghastly tragedy too--its silent scene his heart--forsaken, lonely as he was.