“They were then all gathered together in death: my legitimate father and mother, the bold usurper of her just rights, and my gentle brother. The governess I buried without a tombstone; she was not worthy of any; the common earth I could not refuse her, but even that I thought too good for her: but I will no longer speak of her, nor trouble you with my personal animosities, but will hasten to the conclusion of my tale.
“I took possession, as sole and natural heir, of the remnant of fortune and estate left me; but finding the castle so deeply mortgaged, that it was more trouble to keep than it was worth, I sold it; I was partly induced to do so from Lelia’s nervous dread of remaining in the house where so terrible a murder had been committed, and partly from my incapacity to sustain so expensive an establishment with such small means. I felt much regret at parting with the halls of my ancestors, but the desolate castle would have made a gloomy home for so young a creature as Lelia; she was now at an age when society and gay life would please and captivate; and I determined to take her to Paris with me. The prospect of leaving the solitude and isolation, to which her whole lifetime had been alone devoted, charmed her.
“The home of my childhood passed into stranger-hands. Previous to our departure I caused diligent search to be made in the vicinity for the wicked father Ignatius; but he had disappeared as strangely as he came, and left no trace of his coming or exit. I was convinced, however, from numerous circumstances, traced to their cause, that he was not concerned in or any way accessory to my father’s and stepmother’s death. Judging from what the domestics told me, and from what I gathered from the neighboring gentry whom my father visited, I surmised that remorse had at last seized upon that man of iron nerve: becoming tired of the governess, or else conceiving a hatred to her, from recollection of the evil deed she had induced him to commit, violent quarrels, crimination and recrimination, was the natural result of alienation of affection; when under the influence of anger we lose our self-consciousness, and know not what we do: in a fit of rage he killed her; and, dreading the consequences, and disgrace, added the last act to this tragedy of sin, and committed suicide. That death scene I shall never forget; no, not if I were to live a thousand years: it haunts me yet with frightful vividness.
“I took Lelia with me to Paris, where she afterwards married, well and happily, the man of her choice, and lives there still.
“I resumed the practice of the law, and became distinguished in that profession. From association with the gayeties of the metropolis, I confess I contracted habits I regret having acquired: my disposition was ardent and excitable, and it carried me too far. I played high, and was seldom fortunate,—almost invariably losing. From mixing with society of a certain class, I acquired the reputation of a roué in many instances; that, also, was undeserved; although at that time young and vain, I was more easily caught in love snares than at present. Thus, for some three years longer, I led a gay, wild, yet unhappy life. Then I began to weary of this futile way of spending time. My health had become impaired by excess, and satiety had taken the place of levity. I wished to find some woman in whose integrity I could confide, and marry her, and become a better man; but among all the gay, the rich, the talented, the beautiful women with whom I was acquainted, none suited me, none equalled my expectations. Sometimes I saw a woman whose personelle pleased me; but, on acquaintance, I always discovered something wanting in the mind,—something I could wish added or taken away. I could no where find my Psyche. I gave up my profession, although it yielded me a fine income, and came here to Naples.
“Here I have been living since, unhappy and listless amid pleasures, longing for something I have never yet found, and have thought, till I saw you, I never should find; but at the countess’ ball, where first I saw your gentle face, I felt irresistibly attracted toward you: nor has acquaintance disappointed the illusion of fancy; but, on the contrary, strengthened it, and I now love, where first I admired: your upright principles, your beauty, your unblemished reputation and pure heart, have won my love and esteem. Nature evidently designed you for private life, cultivated and elegant society. Let me then be that faithful friend, lover, and husband,—three principles in one person—who shall guard and guide your steps through the quick-sands of life. Consent to redeem me from past errors: teach me to shape my course more worthily in future. Woman’s influence, when she exerts it in the right way, is great; do you then become my Mentor, and I will be as docile and obedient as Telemachus.”
Monsieur ceased. Meanwhile the bougie was extinguished, and the rays of moonlight, as they tremblingly broke through the clouds, alone illumed the room. I did not like to be sitting there so late at night, and with a gentleman alone.
“It is late: I know I am intruding upon you,” said he, and he rose upon his feet; “yet, before I go, say that I may hope—say, dearest Genevra, that you accept me.” He pressed my hands in his. I heard him; but did not take the sense of what he said. I was in a dream: one of those delightful waking dreams of fairy land, in which I have so often indulged.
“No answer still, Genevra. Are you angry?”