21. Do not allow a pronoun to refer to a word not likely to be central in the reader's thought; a word, for example, in the possessive case, or in a parenthetical expression, or in a compound, or not expressed at all. Make the pronoun refer to an emphatic word.
- Wrong: When a poor woman came to Jane Addams' famous Hull House, she always gave help. [Poor woman and Hull House are the emphatic words, to which any pronoun used later is instinctively referred by the reader.]
- Right: When a poor woman came to Jane Addams' famous Hull House, she always received help. [Or] When a poor woman came to Hull House, Jane Addams always gave help.
- Wrong: In biology, which is the study of plants and animals we find that they are made up of unitary structures called cells. [Since the words plants and animals occur only in a parenthetical clause, the reader is surprised to find them used as an antecedent.]
- Right: In the study of biology we find that plants and animals are made up of unitary structures called cells.
- Wrong: This old scissors-grinder sharpens them for the whole neighborhood. [The center of interest in the reader's mind is a man, not scissors.]
- Right: This old scissors-grinder sharpens scissors for the whole neighborhood.
- Wrong: I always liked engineers, and I have chosen that as my profession.
- Right: I always liked engineering, and I have chosen it as my profession.
- Absurd: When the baby is through drinking milk, it should be disconnected and put in boiling water. [The central idea in the reader's mind is baby, not milk-bottle. The writer may have been thinking about the bottle, but he did not make the word emphatic; in fact, he did not express it at all.]
- Right: When the baby is through drinking milk, the bottle should be taken apart and put in boiling water.
[Note.]—Ordinarily, do not refer to the title in the first line of a theme. The reader expects you to assert something, and face forward, not to turn back to what you have said in the title.
- Faulty:
- Color Photography
- I am interested in this new development of science. For a long time I ...
- Right:
- Color Photography
- Taking pictures in color has long appealed to me as an interesting possibility ...
Exercise:
- In Shakespeare's play Othello he makes Iago a fiend.
- The noodle-cutter is a kitchen device which saves time in making this troublesome dish.
- The life of a forester is interesting, and I intend to follow that profession.
- He took down his great-grandfather's old sword, who had carried it at Bunker Hill.
- I was always making experiments in science, and I naturally acquired a liking for periodicals of that nature.
[Broad Reference]
22. Do not use a pronoun to refer broadly to a general idea. Supply a definite antecedent or abandon the pronoun.
- Wrong: The tapper strikes the gong, which continues as long as the push button is pressed. [The writer intends that which shall refer to the entire preceding clause, but the reference is intercepted by the word gong.]
- Right [supplying a definite antecedent]: The tapper strikes the gong, a process which continues as long as the push button is pressed. [Or, abandoning the pronoun] The tapper strikes the gong as long as the push button is pressed.
- Wrong: Read the directions which are printed on the bottle and it may save you from making a mistake.
- Right [supplying a definite antecedent]: Read the directions which are printed on the bottle. This precaution may save you from making a mistake. [Or, abandoning the pronoun] Reading the directions on the bottle may prevent a mistake.
- Wrong: The managers told him they would increase his salary if he would represent them in South America. He refused that.
- Right: The managers told him they would increase his salary if he would represent them in South America. He refused the offer.
Exception.—It cannot be maintained that a pronoun must always have one definite word for its antecedent. Many of the best English authors occasionally use a pronoun to refer to a clause. But the reference must always be clear.