The Prisoner—"But how can I admit stealing the dog when I am entirely innocent?"
The Court—"Did you ever see the dog said to have been stolen?"
Prisoner—"Yes, sir." (Profound sensation.)
Court—"And yet you have the audacity to stand there and say you didn't steal it?"
Prisoner—"A great many other people saw the dog."
Court—"Perhaps so; but they would make trouble if you or anyone else began insinuating against them, so I don't propose to have their names hauled in here. Of all the men who saw the dog and had a chance to steal it, you are the only one whose conviction would satisfy the general public."
Prisoner—"I can bring witnesses who saw another man steal the dog. I can prove that he confessed to stealing the dog and that he has fled to escape punishment."
Court—"You ought not to bring any such testimony into this court, for if you do so you are going to upset some theories held by very dear friends of mine, and if I permit the introduction of such testimony, there is no telling what they will say about me. If you didn't steal the dog isn't there something else you have done that is punishable in one way or another?"
Prisoner—"I can't think of anything just now."
Court—"Oh, pshaw! Aren't you guilty of something? Just think a moment. Nearly every man is guilty of something. If we can find you guilty of any old crime it will help some."