A Fool and His Money

by George Barr McCutcheon

"I suggest a way in which you can be of assistance to me, and you hesitate. How am I to take it, sir?"

His infernal air of superiority aggravated me. "You may take it just as you please, Mr. Pless."

"I beg you to remember that I am Count Tarnowsy. Mr.—"

I arose. "The gist of the matter is this: you want to borrow one hundred and fifty thousand dollars of me. That is—"

He hastened to correct me. "I do not call it borrowing when one gives ample security for the amount involved."

"What is your idea of borrowing, may I ask?"

"Borrowing is the same thing as asking a favour according to our conception of the transaction. I am not asking a favour of you, sir. Far from it. I am offering you an opportunity to put a certain amount of money out at a high rate of interest."

"Well, then, we'll look at it in that light. I am not in a position to invest so much money at this time. To be perfectly frank with you, I haven't the money lying loose."

"Suppose that I were to say that any day inside the next three or four weeks would be satisfactory to me," said he, as if he were granting me a favour. "Please be seated, Mr. Smart." He glanced at his watch. "I have ordered a light supper to be sent up at ten o'clock. We can—"

"Thank you. I fear it is impossible for me to remain."