THE DEVIL
You see I discovered—in spite of all my work—that as soon as I built men up to a highly civilized state, they fell right down again. There was Egypt—look at the Pyramids. There was Greece—I was proud of Greece—its philosophy—drama—architecture—I’ve never done so well since. There was Rome. What fellows those Romans were—owned the world. There was Spain—so did she. England! I still have hopes of England under my new system. But what happened to the others? Smash! Crash! Bang! And I had to start training savages again. I didn’t realize what the matter was—I tried every system—and then, when England started to smash, my eyes opened—the fault was women—
AGNUS
Why, women have always been our refining influences. They draw out our nobler selves.
THE DEVIL
They draw out your sentimental selves, cunning minxes. Men were dragged down, their philosophy sapped, their reason rotted, by living with inferior creatures. You see, while men were out battling with circumstances and learning to use their brains, women were slaves. Had brains, right enough, but didn’t get a chance to use them. Men played the grand act with them (imitating a pompous man’s tone): “Now don’t bother your little head about that, dearie, papa’ll fix it.” Well, about the beginning of the last century, I realized I must let men alone for awhile—and work on women. So first, I created an industrial revolution that would send women out to work in the world—like men—
AGNUS (angrily)
That proves what a devil you are! (Sentimentally) Ah, those good old days when every father could support his daughter until she married—when every wife was in her true sphere—the home.
THE DEVIL (contemptuously)
That shows how men’s brains have gone back while I worked on women. I was so absorbed in women that I forgot men for fifty years until, thoroughly alarmed, I created Bernard Shaw out of an ordinary Irish wit by becoming him—