A gentleman, of Tavistock, purchased a pair of silver spectacles, declared to be very fine pebbles, price thirty-five shillings; they were merely glass; and as he required a glass in an old pair of spectacles, the pompous hawker offered to oblige him by putting one of his “clarified lenses” to match the focus: for this he charged five shillings and sixpence. It was two inches different in focal length to the original glass! which would have been properly matched, by any resident optician, for one shilling!
One of the hawking tribe called at the residence of Major C——, near Hereford, and represented that M——, Esq., had ordered, on the previous day, two pairs of spectacles, and desired him to call upon his friend, the major, to suit him also. In this case the attack was parried; and, spite of the hawker’s vehement declaration, that the eyes were in a terrible state, he was dismissed, “to call again to-morrow.” Thus the major preserved his eyes, and saved his money. In the evening he saw his friend, and inquired if he had sent a fellow to his house with spectacles? “No,” was the reply, “but you sent him to me; for he came this afternoon, saying you had bought two pairs, and wished me to have some of the same kind; therefore, I bought two pairs, and paid him the price he said you gave, viz., three pounds, ten shillings, though at first he wanted four guineas!”
A naval captain, residing at Monmouth, showed me a pair of silver spectacles with six-inch focus glasses, very jagged and splintered at the edges, worth at most twelve shillings, for which he had given one of the tribe of impostors two guineas, and a pair of tortoiseshell (which did suit his sight) into the bargain.[11]
A lady at Belfast was attracted by the showy advertisement of an itinerant optician, and called upon him, “between the hours of ten and six,” for the purpose of purchasing a pair of spectacles. The first thing he did, after staring at her, and impudently declaring that her eyes were being ruined, was to snatch her spectacles from her face, and put a pair of his own in their place. “There, Matam! they are the spattacles for your eyes, those you have peen vearing vill pring on kataract.” “I see pretty well in these,” said the lady, “but my own suit about as well, I think.” “Oh dear no, it’s quite a mistake, your own are retched; put them on—isn’t there a differench now, Matam?” “Yes, there is,” said the lady, (who had too much penetration for the pedlar) “they require cleaning after having been held in your hot hand all this time;” and taking up a washleather she wiped the glasses, and, replacing them, bade adieu to the testimonialed optician.
A lady, who was visiting for a few weeks at Margate, was startled one morning, by a big, blustering, shewily-dressed man, who, after knocking at the street door, pushed past the servant, and rapping loudly at the parlour door opened it without waiting for any reply. “Goot morning, Matam, I am the optician to the royal family; your friend, Lady W——, terives so much goot from my pellucit lenses, she peggd me to call and suit you.” Before all this had been uttered he had taken a package from a confederate, dressed as a livery servant, who accompanied him, and covered the table with his stock. “Your eyes are in a most alarming state Matam, this pair of cold spattacles will suit you.” “Really,” said the lady; “how came Lady W—— to suppose I wanted spectacles? I have never worn any at any time in my life.” “No, that’s the vary reason your sight is leaving you; your eyes are vary pad.” “What is the price of this pair?” inquired the lady. “Three guineas” was the answer. The price was paid; and after punishing her eyes for a few days, the lady met with a scientific friend who convinced her that they were totally unfit and improper for her, her eyes being in excellent order, and not requiring spectacles at all!
A gentleman, visiting at Canterbury, in 1834, was induced through the representations of the same notorious cheat to purchase a pair of spectacles, which were warranted to dissipate the cataract forming in his eye; the price paid was five pounds. As he was lamenting the terrible state in which he was informed his eyes certainly were (although, strange to say, he was quite unconscious of it) another pair was placed upon his nose, which, he was told he ought to wear as a change, in case the eyes were pained by the efforts of the first pair to dissipate the cataract. Another five pound note was handed over to the hawker, who began to grow quite pathetic; and artfully alluding to the services of the gentleman during the war, and expatiating upon a few circumstances with which he had made himself acquainted in a chat with one of the gossips at the public house where he lodged, he pretended to lament the necessity for the gentleman staying within doors. “What, may I not take a walk or ride as usual? I can’t endure being cooped up within doors.” “There’s danger in your going out,” said the pedlar, “except your eyes are guarded with green Refractive Preservers.” “Oh, bless me,” said the gentleman, “that’s very serious; then you really think I ought to have another pair for walking and riding, eh?” “Oh certainly, by all means; nothing else can save your eyes, unless you confine yourself within doors.” “What’s the price of such a pair of preservers?” “Six guineas, Sir; but as you have bought the others you shall have them for five pounds.” “Why, dear me, I shall be ruined in buying spectacles, and yet I never felt that I wanted them before.” “That’s just the vay, ven the eyes are a’going blind it comes on all at once, my tear Sir.”
By this transaction the pedlar actually pocketed three five pound notes. In less than a week afterwards the first two pair were sent to me to have the yellow coloured glasses exchanged for white lenses of four degrees less magnifying power; the price at which the whole three pairs could have been purchased elsewhere would be forty-five shillings.
It will scarcely be credited that the individuals who thus practise on the public are grossly ignorant; and were it not that the anxiety of the purchasers to possess something extraordinary renders them liable to imposition and allays suspicion, such shallow pretensions never would pass undetected.
One of the tribe, who, until lately, practised the art and mystery of his forefathers as a dealer in old clothes, suddenly changed his profession, and, calculating the chances to be two to one in his favour, ventured, neck or nothing, to blazon himself forth as an experienced, scientific, and practical optician. A book, bearing his name as its author, and sundry special appointments, obtained by dint of the most brazen assurance and persevering importunity, were ostentatiously paraded before the wondering eyes of her majesty’s liege subjects. The public are stultified, and the eminent individual himself, is almost astonished that the scheme should take, and like the “Fly preserved in amber, wonders how the d—— he came there.”
There are artists in his locality who can give many graphic illustrations of the disregard to truth, violation of friendship, and cunning perversion of facts, of which this individual has been guilty, and yet no one has a greater array of eminent names and testimonials to show—many signatures of really clever men having been obtained by some means or other. Surely there is much piquancy and truth in the Spanish proverb: “those who know most are oftenest cheated.”