Madna, ca—rahm
Ram li ta, co-ca-la lir jhi!
La li ta la, vanga-la ta perisi.
'Coc-coka-cokatoo!' screamed a harsh voice, which I certainly could distinguish from the first. 'Pretty cockatoo!' said the other coaxingly; and the next minute the large pink-flushed bird itself popped his head over the top-stones above the door, floundering about with his throat foul of the silver chain fast to his leg, till he hung by his beak on my side of the wall, half-choked, and trying to croak out—'Pretty—pretty cocky!' Before I had time to think, the door opened, and, by heavens! there was my very charmer herself, with the shade of the green leaves showered over her distressed face. She had scarcely seen me before I sprang up and caught the cockatoo, which bit me like an imp incarnate, till the blood ran down my fingers as I handed it to its mistress, my heart in my mouth, and more than a quarter-deck bow in my cap. The young lady looked at me first in surprise, as may be supposed, and then, with a smile of thanks that set my brain all afloat, 'Oh, dear me!' exclaimed she, 'you are hurt!' 'Hurt!' I said, looking so bewildered, I suppose, that she couldn't help laughing. 'Tippoo is very stupid,' continued she, smiling, 'because he is out of his own country, I think. You shall have no sugar to-night, mister cockatoo, for biting your friends.'
"'Were you—ever in India—madam?' I stammered out. 'Not since I was a child,' she answered; but just then I saw the figure of the nabob sauntering down the garden, and said I had particular business and must be off. 'You are very busy here, sir?' said the charming young creature archly. 'You are longing till you go to sea, I daresay—like Tippoo and me.' 'You?' said I, staring at the keyhole whilst she caught my eye, and blushed a little, as I thought 'Yes, we are going—I long to see India again, and I remember the sea, too, like a dream.'
"Oh, heavens! thought I, when I heard the old gentleman call out—'Lota! Lota, beebee-lee! Kabultah, meetoowah?' [6] and away she vanished behind the door, with a smile dropped to myself. The tone of the judge's voice, and his speaking Hindoo, showed he was fond of his daughter at any rate. Off I went, too, as much confused as before, only for the new thought in my head. 'The sea, the sea!' I shouted, as soon as out of hearing, and felt the wind, as 'twere, coming from aft at last, like the first ripple. 'Yes, by George!' said I, 'outward bound for a thousand. I'll go, if it was before the mast.' All at once I remembered I didn't know the ship's name, or when. Next day, and the next again, I was skulking about my old place, but nobody appeared—not so much as a shadow inside the keyhole. At last one evening, just as I was going away, the door opened; I strolled slowly along, when, instead of the charming Lota, out came the flat brown turban of an ugly kitmagar, with a moustache, looking round to see who was there. 'Salaam, sah'b,' said the brown fellow, holding the door behind him with one paw. 'Burra judge sahib bhote bhote salaam send uppiser [7] sah'b—'ope not dekhe [8] after sahib cook-maid.' 'Joot baht, hurkut-jee,' [9] said I, laughing. 'Sah'b been my coontree?' inquired the Bengalee more politely. 'Jee, yes,' I said, wishing to draw him out 'I Inglitsh can is-peek,' continued the dark footman, conceitedly; 'ver well sah'b, but one misfortune us for come i-here. Baud carry make—plenty too much poork—too much graug drink. Termeric—chili—banana not got—not coco-tree got—pah! Baud coontree, too much i-cold, sah'b?' 'Curse the rascal's impudence,' I thought, but I asked him if he wasn't going back. 'Yis, sah'b, such baht [10] Al-il aláh? Mohummud burra Meer-kea. Bote too much i-smell, my coontree.' 'When are you going?' I asked, carelessly. 'Two day this time, sah'b.' 'Can you tell me the name of the ship?' I went on. The kitmagar looked at me slyly, stroked his moustache, and meditated; after which he squinted at me again, and his lips opened so as to form the magic word, Buckshish? 'Jee,' said I, holding out a crown piece, 'the ship's name and the harbour?' 'Se,' began he; the coin touched his palm—'ring'; his fingers closed on it, and 'patahm,' dropped from his leathery lips. 'The Seringapatam?' I said. 'Ahn, sah'b.' 'London, eh?' I added; to which he returned another reluctant assent, as if it wasn't paid for, and I walked off. However, I had not got round the corner before I noticed the figure of the old gentleman himself looking after me from the doorway; his worthy kitmagar salaaming to the ground, and no doubt giving information how the 'cheep uppiser' had tried to pump him to no purpose. The nabob looked plainly as suspicious as if I had wanted to break into his house, since he held his hand over his eyes to watch me out of sight.
"At night, I told my mother and sister I should be off to London next day for sea. What betwixt their vexation at losing me, and their satisfaction to see me more cheerful, with talking over matters, we sat up half the night. I was so ashamed, though, to tell them what I intended, considering what a fool's chase it would seem to anyone but myself, that I kept all close; and, I am sorry to say, I was so full of my love-affair, with the wild adventure of it, the sea, and everything besides, as not to feel their anxiety enough. How it was to turn out I didn't know; but somehow or other I was resolved I'd contrive to make a rope if I couldn't find one; at the worst, I might carry the ship, gain over the men, or turn pirate and discover an island. Early in the morning I packed my traps, drew a cheque for my prize-money, got the coach, and bowled off for London, to knock up Bob Jacobs, my sea godfather; this being the very first step, as it seemed to me, in making the plan feasible. Rough sort of confidant as he may look, there was no man living I would have trusted before him for keeping a secret. Bob was true as the topsail sheets; and if you only gave him the course to steer, without any of the 'puzzlement,' as he called the calculating part, he would stick to it, blow high, blow low. He was just the fellow I wanted for the lee brace, as it were, to give my weather one a purchase, even if I had altogether liked the notion of setting off all alone on what I couldn't help suspecting was a sufficiently harebrained scheme as it stood; and, to tell the truth, it was only to a straightforward, simple-hearted tar like Jacobs that I could have plucked up courage to make it known. I knew he would enter into it like a reefer volunteering for a cutting out, and make nothing of the difficulties—especially when a love matter was at the bottom of it: the chief question was how to discover his whereabouts, as Wapping is rather a wide word. I adopted the expedient of going into all the tobacco-shops to inquire after Jacobs, knowing him to be a more than commonly hard smoker, and no great drinker ashore. I was beginning to be tired out, however, and give up the quest, when, at the corner of a lane near the docks, I caught sight of a little door adorned with what had apparently been part of a ship's figure-head—the face of a nymph or nereid, four times as large as life, with tarnished gilding, and a long wooden pipe in her mouth that had all the effect of a bowsprit, being stayed up by a piece of marline to a hook in the wall, probably in order to keep clear of people's heads. The words painted on its two head-boards, as under a ship's bow, were 'Betsy Jacobs,' and 'licensed' on the top of the door; the window was stowed full of cakes of cavendish, twists of negrohead, and coils of pigtail; so that, having heard my old shipmate speak of a certain Betsy, both as sweetheart and partner, I made at once pretty sure of having lighted, by chance, on his very dry-dock, and went in without more ado. I found nobody in the little shop, but a rough voice, as like as possible to Jacobs' own, was chanting the sea-song of 'Come, cheer up, my lads, 'tis to glory we steer,' in the back-room, in a curious sleepy kind of drone, interrupted every now and then by the suck of his pipe, and a mysterious thumping sound, which I could only account for by the supposition that the poor fellow was mangling clothes, or gone mad. I was obliged to kick on the counter with all my might, in competition, before an eye was applied from inside to the little window; after which, as I expected, the head of Jacobs was thrust out of the door, his hair rough, three days' beard on his chin, and he in his shirt and trousers. 'Hisht!' said he, in a low voice, not seeing me distinctly for the light, 'you're not calling the watch, my lad! Hold on a bit, and I'll serve your orders directly.' After another stave of 'Hearts of oak are our ships,' etc., in the same drawl, and a still more vigorous thumping than before, next minute out came Bob again; with a wonderful air of importance, though, and drawing in one hand, to my great surprise, the slack of a line of 'half-inch,' on which he gave now and then a tug and an ease off, as he came forward, like a fellow humouring a newly-hooked fish. 'Now, then, my hearty!' said he, shading his eyes with the other hand, 'bear a——' 'Why, Jacobs, old ship,' I said, 'what's this you're after? Don't you know your old apprentice, eh?'
"Jacobs looked at my cap and epaulette, and gave out his breath in a whistle, the only other sign of astonishment being that he let go his unaccountable-looking piece of cord. 'Lord bless me, Master Ned!' said he—'I axes pardon, Lieutenant Collins, your honour!' 'Glad you know me this time, Bob, my lad, 'said I, looking round—'and a comfortable berth you've got of it, I daresay. But what the deuce are you about in there? You haven't a savage, too, like some friends of yours I fell in with a short time ago! Or perhaps a lion or a tiger, eh, Jacobs?' 'No, no, your honour—lions be blowed!' replied he, laughing, but fiddling with his hands all the while, and standing between me and the room, as if half-ashamed. ''Tis ownly the tiller-ropes of a small craft I am left in charge of, sir. But won't ye sit down, your honour, till such time as my old 'ooman comes aboard to relieve me, sir? Here's a cheer, and may be you'd make so free for to take a pipe of prime Americane, your honour?' 'Let's have a look into your cabin though, Bob, my man,' said I, curious to know what was the secret; when all at once a tremendous squall from within let me sufficiently into it. The old salt had been rocking the cradle, with a fine little fellow of a baby in it, and a line made fast to keep it in play when he served the shop. 'All the pitch is in the fire now, your honour,' said he, looking terribly nonplussed; 'I've broached him to, and he's all aback till his mammy gets a hold of him.' 'A good pipe the little rogue's got though,' said I; 'and a fine child he is, Jacobs—do for a bo'sun yet.' 'Why, yes, sir,' said he, rubbing his chin with a gratified smile, as the urchin kicked, threw out his arms, and roared like to break his heart; 'I'm thinking he's a sailor all over, by natur', as one may say. He don't like a calm no more nor myself; but that's the odds of being ashore, where you needs to keep swinging the hammocks by hand, instead of havin' it done for you, sir.' In the midst of the noise, however, we were caught by the sudden appearance of Mistress Jacobs herself—a good-looking young woman, with a market-basket full of bacon and greens, and a chubby little boy holding by her apron, who came through the shop. The first thing she did was to catch up the baby out of the cradle, and begin hushing it, after one or two side-glances of reproach at her husband, who attempted to cover his disgrace by saying, 'Betsy, my girl, where's your manners? why don't you off hats to the leftenant?—it's my wife, your honour.' Mrs Jacobs curtsied twice very respectfully, though not particularly fond of the profession, as I found afterwards; and I soon quite gained her smiles and good graces by praising her child, with the remark that he was too pretty ever to turn out a sailor; for, sharp as mothers are to detect this sort of flattery to anybody else's bantling, you always find it take wonderfully with respect to their own. Whenever Jacobs and I were left to ourselves, I struck at once into my scheme—the more readily for feeling I had the weather hand of him in regard of his late appearance. It was too ridiculous, the notion of one of the best foretopmen that ever passed a weather-earing staying at home to rock his wife's cradle and attend the shop; and he was evidently aware of it as I went on. It was a little selfish, I daresay, and Mrs Jacobs would perhaps have liked me none the better for it; but I proposed to him to get a berth in the Indiaman, sail with me for Bombay, and stand by for a foul hitch in something or other. 'Why, sir,' said he,' it shan't be said of Bob Jacobs he were ever the man to hang back where a matter was to be done that must be done. I doesn't see the whole bearings of it as yet, but ownly you give the orders, sir, and I'll stick to 'em.' ''Tis a long stretch between this and Bombay, Jacobs,' said I, 'and plenty of room for chances.' 'Ay, ay, sir, no doubt,' said he, 'your honour can talk the length of the best bower cable.' 'More than that, Bob, my lad,' said I, 'I know these Company men; if they once get out of their regular jog, they're as helpless as a pig adrift on a grating; and before they grow used to sailing out of convoy, with no frigates to whip them in, depend upon it Mother Carey will have to teach them a new trick or two.' 'Mayhap, sir,' put in Jacobs, doubtfully, 'the best thing 'ud be if they cast the ship away altogether, as I've seen done myself for the matter of an insurance. Ye know, sir, they lets it pass at Lloyd's now the war's over, seein' it brings customers to the underwriters, if so be ownly it don't come over often for the profits. Hows'ever it needs a good seaman to choose his lee-shore well, no doubt.' 'Oh!' answered I, laughing, 'but the chances are, all hands would want to be Robinson Crusoe at once! No, no—only let's get aboard, and take things as they come.' 'What's the ship's name, sir?' inquired Jacobs, sinking his voice, and looking cautiously over his shoulder toward the door. 'The Seringapatam—do you know her?' I said. 'Ay, ay, sir, well enough,' said he, readily—'a lump of a ship she is, down off Blackwall in the stream, with two more—country-built, and tumbles home rather much from below the plank-sheer for a sightly craft, besides being flat in the eyes of her, and round in the counter, just where she shouldn't, sir. Them Parchee Bombay shipwrights does clap on a lot of onchristien flummeries and gilt mouldings, let alone quarter-galleries fit for the king's castle!' 'In short, she's tea-waggon all over,' said I, 'and just as slow and as leewardly, to boot, as teak can make her?' 'Her lines is not that bad, though, your honour,' continued Jacobs, 'if you just knocked off her poop—and she'd bear a deal o' beating for a sea-boat. They've got a smart young mate, too; for I seed him t'other day a-sending up the yards, and now she's as square as a frigate, all ready to drop down river.' The short and long of it was, that I arranged with my old shipmate, who was fully bent on the cruise, whether Mrs Jacobs should approve or not, that, somehow or other, we should both ship our hammocks on board of the Seringapatam—he before the mast, and I wherever I could get. On going to the agent's, however—which I did as soon as I could change my uniform for plain clothes—I found, to my great disappointment, from a plan of the accommodations, that not only were the whole of the poop-cabins taken, but those on the main-deck also. Most of the passengers, I ascertained, were ladies, with their children and nurses, going back to India, and raw young cadets, with a few commercial and civilian nondescripts; there were no troops or officers, and room enough, except for one gentleman having engaged the entire poop, at an immense expense, for his own use. This I, of course, supposed was the nabob, but the clerk was too close to inform me. 'You must try another ship, sir,' said he, coolly, as he shut the book. 'Sorry for it, but we have another booked to sail in a fortnight. A1, sir; far finer vessel—couple of hundred tons larger—and sails faster.' 'You be hanged!' muttered I, walking out; and a short time after I was on board. The stewards told me as much again; but on my slipping a guinea into the fingers of one, he suddenly recollected there was a gentleman in state-room No. 14, starboard side of the main skylight, who, being alone, might perhaps be inclined to take a chum, if I dealt with him privately. 'Yankee, sir, he is,' said the steward, by way of a useful hint. However, I didn't need the warning, at sight of the individual's long nose, thin lips, and sallow jaw-bones, without a whisker on his face, and his shirt-collar turned down, as he sat overhauling his traps beside the carronade, which was tethered in the state-room, with its muzzle through the port. He looked a good deal like a jockey beside his horse; or, as a wit of a schoolboy cadet said afterwards, the Boston gentleman, calling himself Daniel C. Snout, Esquire—like Daniel praying in the lion's den, and afraid it might turn round and roar. I must say the idea didn't quite delight me, nor the sight of a fearful quantity of baggage which was stowed up against the bulkhead; but after introducing myself and objecting to the first few offers, I at last concluded a bargain with the American for a hundred guineas, provisions exclusive, which, he remarked, was 'considerable low, I prognosticate, mister!' 'However,' said he, 'I expect you're a conversationable individual a little: I allowed for that, you know, mister. One can't do much of a trade at sea—that's a fact; and I calculate we'll swap information by the way. I'm water-pruff, I tell you, as all our nation is. You'll not settle at Bumbay, I reckon, mister?' But though I meant to pay my new messmate in my own coin at leisure afterwards, and be as frank and open as day with him—the only way to meet a Yankee—I made off at present as fast as possible to bring my things aboard, resolving to sleep at Blackwall, and then to stow myself out of sight for sick, until there was somebody to take off the edge of his confounded talk.
"Next afternoon, accordingly, I found myself once more afloat, the Indiaman dropping down with the first breeze. The day after, she was running through the Downs with it pretty strong from north-east, a fair wind—the pilot-boat snoring off close-hauled to windward, with a white spray over her nose; and the three dungaree topsails of the Seringapatam lifting and swelling, as yellow as gold, over her white courses in the blue Channel haze. The breeze freshened till she rolled before it, and everything being topsyturvy on deck, the lumber in the way, the men as busy as bees setting her ship-shape—it would have been as much as a passenger's toes were worth to show them from below; so that I was able to keep by myself, just troubling my seamanship so much as to stand clear of the work. Enjoy it I did, too; the first sniff of the weather was almost enough to make me forget what I was there for. I was every now and then on the point of fisting a rope, and singing out to the men; till at length I thought it more comfortable, even for me, to run up the mizzen shrouds when everybody was forward, where I stowed myself out of sight in the cross-trees.
"About dusk, while I was waiting to slip down, a stronger puff than ordinary made them clue up the mizzen-royal from deck, which I took upon myself to furl offhand—quick enough to puzzle a couple of boys that came aloft for the purpose, especially as, in the meantime, I had got down upon the topsail-yard-arm out of their notice. When they got on deck again, I heard the little fellows telling some of the men, in a terrified sort of way, how the mizzen-royal had either stowed itself, or else it was Dick Wilson's ghost, that fell off the same yard last voyage—more by token, he used always to make fast the gaskets just that fashion. At night, however, the wind having got lighter, with half moonlight, there was a muster of some passengers on deck, all sick and miserable, as they tried to keep their feet, and have the benefit of air—the Yankee being as bad as the worst. I thought it wouldn't do for me to be altogether free, and accordingly stuck fast by Mr Snout, with my head over the quarter-deck bulwarks, looking into his face, and talking away to him, asking all sorts of questions about what was good for sea-sickness, then giving a groan to prevent myself laughing, when the spray splashed up upon his 'water-pruff' face, he responding to it as Sancho Panza did to Don Quixote, when the one examined the other's mouth after a potion. All he could falter out was, how he wondered I could speak at all when sick. 'Oh! oh dear!' said I with another howl. 'Yes—'tis merely because I can't think! And I daresay you are thinking so much you can't talk—the sea is so full of meditation, as Lord Byron——oh—oh—this water will be the death of me!' 'I feel as if—the whole—tarnation Atlantic was—inside of my bowels!' gasped he through his nostrils. 'Oh!' I could not help putting in, as the ship and Mr Snout both gave a heave up, 'and coming out of you!'