Another awkward pause, and then again John broke the ice—
"I have not much more to ask, Miss Wilson, and believe me when I assure you that mine are not idle or impertinent questions; but is it true that you have no other resource than that mentioned by your mother? Is it possible that you will have to go into domestic service?"
"It seems so, Mr. Tincroft; I don't know of anything else I am fit for, if I am fit for that," said Sarah, with quivering lips.
"You are fit for something better than that," said John, softly; "and you are fit for something better than I can offer. But if you wouldn't mind being a poor man's wife—" And here again John came to a pause.
"I don't know what you can mean, Mr. Tincroft." This was said in a tone of unfeigned surprise, accompanied by a look of alarmed pride. "I hope you don't mean to insult me because everybody else does the same."
"I am very far from intending this," replied John. "And I would not make you an offer if I could think of anything better for you. I know," he went on, "that in some respects we are not entirely suited to each other—at least, that I am not everything you might look for. I am a recluse, and shy, and much more that isn't agreeable; but I know I am honest in my wish to make you happy."
"Mr. Tincroft, what do you mean?" exclaimed Sarah, wildly.
And by degrees John told the damsel what he meant, namely, that the only compensation he could make to her for the unintentional mischief he had wrought, was to take her himself for better, for worse, for richer or poorer, and so on, till death should them part. He begged her to understand that he was very poor, that he had no certain prospect of an income after the little that remained of his property was gone; for he had determined on giving up his appointment, if Sarah would agree to his proposal.
And as to the Tincroft estate, of which he had once vainly boasted, he had lost all faith in that. But there was enough, he went on to say, to maintain them (and Sarah's mother too, if she would live with them) in very strict economy for a year or two; and John thought he might get some employment in teaching, perhaps, or in some other way. But as he had always been under a cloud, so he expected to be to the end of the chapter.
"And so, Miss Wilson, you see," added he, by way of summing up, "it is but little that I can offer you. Still, if you will accept it, I will promise to be your faithful husband."