I've had the lumbager, dyspepsy, and ager,

With tight-fitting veskits and pantaloons too;

Highsterics and swimins, delirious trimins,

St. Vestris's dance, and the tick dolly-oo.

But not the whole gettin', one's body tight fits in,

Is noffin' to this, which is drefful. Oh, oh!

Drat these grand fashions! they wakens my passions,

A-nippin' and gnawin' my poor stomach so!

(Heads disappear.)