“But had you not better be silent now?” hinted Septimus.
“No,” said the old man testily; “being so quiet, and having no one to talk to has half-killed me as it is. I don’t want to be killed, I want to get out, sir. And, mind you, I don’t say about that poor fellow that she poisoned him, or choked him, or played at she-Othello with the pillow, sir; but there’s plenty of other ways of doing it. The doctor knows the man’s condition, and his danger, and orders him such and such things to keep him going, and bring him round, eh?”
Septimus nodded, for the old man paused for breath; though the wine he had taken made him talk in a voluble and excited manner, but still with perfect coherence.
“Well, sir; and who’s got to carry out the doctor’s orders? Why, the nurse, to be sure. Just push the pillow a little more under my head, sir; she’s made it uncomfortable. That’s it; thanky, sir. Well, you nor no one else won’t believe that a nurse here would do anything wrong. But now, look here: suppose you see that a lamp wants trimming, what do you do? You give orders for it to be trimmed, sir, don’t you?”
Septimus nodded again.
“Well, then,” whispered the old man, hooking one of his long fingers in a buttonhole of his visitor’s coat; “suppose they don’t trim the lamp; suppose it isn’t trimmed, eh? what then?”
“It goes out!” said Septimus.
“To be sure—exactly, sir; and there have been lots of lamps go out here. They won’t trim them, or forget to trim them, and tell themselves they’re only sparing the poor creatures misery, while no one dares to speak about it. Talk of death, sir, they think no more of it here, sir, than one does of snuffing out a candle. You see, decent women won’t come to a place like this to do the work these nurses do. It’s only to be done for money or love. Now it’s done for money, and while it’s done for money it can only be done by hard, heartless, drinking creatures who’ve got women’s shapes and devils’ hearts, sir. But the doctors are all right, sir, only that they don’t see all we poor patients see. If skill and doctoring will put me right, sir, I shall be put right, sir. But I’m scared about it sometimes, and half afraid that some of those beauties will weight the wrong scale so heavily that the doctors won’t pull me square. Sick man’s fancies, sir, eh? Wanderings, ain’t they?”
Septimus Hardon knew not what to say, but whispered such comfort as he could.
“Something ought to be done, you know,” said the old man feebly; “but don’t hint a word of what I’ve said, sir, to a soul—please don’t,” he said pitifully. “You see that all these goings on prey upon a poor fellow’s mind; and if he isn’t low-spirited lying in a hospital-ward, when is he likely to be? One wants sympathy and comfort, sir, and to feel that there’s someone belonging to you who cares for you, and is ready to smooth your pillow, and lay a cold hand upon your hot forehead, and say ‘God bless you!’ and I’ve no one, no one;” and the old man’s voice grew weak and quavering.