Admire with me, my dear Reader, if you know the Lord, His seasonable help. Why does this post-office-order not come a few days sooner or later? Because the Lord would help us by means of it, and therefore influences the donor just then, and not sooner nor later, to send it. Surely, all who know the Lord, and who have no interest in disowning it, cannot but see His hand in a remarkable manner in this work.—Nor will the godly and simple minded reader say:—"There is no difference between this way of proceeding, on the one hand, and going from individual to individual, asking them for means, on the other hand; for the writing of the Reports is just the same thing." My dear Reader, there is a great difference. Suppose, that we are in need. Suppose, that our poverty lasts for some weeks or even some months together. Is there not, in that case, a difference between asking the Lord only from day to day, without speaking to any human being not connected directly with the work about our poverty, on the one hand: and writing letters or making personal application to benevolent individuals for assistance, on the other hand? Truly, there is a great difference between these two modes. I do not mean to say that it would be acting against the precepts of the Lord to seek for help in His work by personal and individual application to believers, (though it would be in direct opposition to His will to apply to unbelievers, 2 Cor. vi. 14-18); but I act in the way in which I do for the benefit of the Church at large, cheerfully bearing the trials, and sometimes the deep trials connected with this life of faith (which however brings along with it also its precious joys), if by any means a part at least of my fellow believers might be led to see the reality of dealing with God only, and that there is such a thing as the child of God having power with God by prayer and faith. That the Lord should use for so glorious a service one so vile, so unfaithful, so altogether unworthy of the least notice as I am, I can only ascribe to the riches of His condescending grace, in which He takes up the most unlikely instruments, that the honour maybe manifestly His. I add only one word more: Should Satan seek to whisper into your ears: Perhaps the matter is made known after all, when there is need (as it has been once said about me at a public meeting in a large town, that when we were in want I prayed publicly that the Lord would send help for the Orphans, which is entirely false); I say, should it be said, that I took care that our wants were made known, I reply: Whom did I ask for any thing these many years since the work has been going on? To whom did I make known our wants, except to those who are closely connected with the work?—Nay, so far from wishing to make known our need, for the purpose of influencing benevolent persons to contribute to the necessities of the Institution under my care, I have even refused to let our circumstances be known, after having been asked about them, when on simply saying that we were in need, I might have had considerable sums. Some instances of this have been given in the former part of this Narrative. In such cases I refused, in order that the hand of God only might be manifest; for that, and not the money, nor even the ability of continuing to carry on the work, is my especial aim. And such self-possession has the Lord given me, that at the times of the deepest poverty, (whilst there was nothing at all in hand, and whilst we had even from meal to meal to wait upon the Lord for the necessities of more than 100 persons), when a donation of 5l. or 10l. or more has been given to me, the donors could not have read in my countenance whether we had much or nothing at all in hand. But enough of this. I have made these few remarks, beloved Reader, lest by any means you should lose the blessing which might come to your soul through reading the account of the Lords faithfulness and readiness to hear the prayers of His children.
Feb. 13. Monday. After having paid out on Saturday all there was in hand, though having quite enough for that day, we had now again to look to the Lord for means, as we generally need several pounds on Mondays. At this time also our faithful Lord did not disappoint us. For there came in late on Saturday, by the sale of articles given for sale, 1l. 8s. 11d., and by sale of stockings, knitted by the boys, 5s. I received also since then by the profit of the sale of ladies bags 10s., by the boxes in my house 1s. 9d., and by two donations 6s. There was also yesterday put into the chapel boxes, half-a-crown with these words: "Trust in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him." Thus we had 2l. l4s. 2d., which was enough for the need of this day.
Feb. 14. I have received nothing since yesterday morning. Nothing therefore was in hand when money was sent for, except 1s. 6d., which was sent up from the Orphan-Houses, by the messenger who came for this days supplies, and which had been received yesterday at the Infant-Orphan-House. I opened the boxes at my house, in which I found 1s. WHILE THE BOY WAS WAITING FOR THE MONEY, the sister who sells the articles which are given to be sold for the benefit of the Orphans, and who knows nothing about our present need, came and brought 12s. for some things which she had sold. With this 14s. 6d. we are able to supply the need of today, as nothing but some bread and milk require to be purchased.
Feb. 15. 2l. 14s. came in from the neighbourhood of Rotherham, besides 1s. 9d. Thus we had enough for this day.
Feb. 16. Yesterday afternoon I received 9s. from two poor sisters at Portsmouth. This, with 9d., which was left of the money which I received yesterday, after the days need had been met, was all I had at the commencement of this day. In the course of the morning was sent by a lady of Ashton, 10s. more. Thus we had 19s. 9d., which sufficed for this day.
Feb. 17. Only 2s. 6d. had come in as a donation, and 2s. 4d. by knitting. This 4s. 10d. was all I could send, hoping in the Lord for more. The information I had from the Boys-Orphan-House was, that the 4s. 10d. supplied the matrons with all that was absolutely needful for today. This evening at nine oclock I received from sister E. Ch. 8s. 9d. for Reports. This is a most precious help, as without it there would be no means to take in the milk tomorrow morning.
Feb. 18. This morning between seven and eight oclock I took the money which came in last night, to the Orphan-Houses, so that we were supplied for the breakfast. We had now to look to the Lord for several pounds, to meet the demands of this day, being Saturday. Between 10 and 11 oclock I again with my wife besought the Lord, entreating Him, that He would be pleased to help us, when a FEW MINUTES AFTER, in this our great need, I received by the first delivery a letter from Barnstaple, containing 5l. for the Orphans. How truly precious, to see thus so manifestly the hand of God day by day stretched out on our behalf!
Feb. 20. Monday. Most seasonable as the help had been, which the Lord so kindly had sent on Saturday morning, and fully as it had supplied our need for that day; yet there was nothing left, after all the expenses had been met, so that we had even on Saturday still further to wait upon the Lord for fresh supplies for this day. Now at this time likewise the Lord has appeared on our behalf. About nine oclock on Saturday evening arrived by post a small parcel from Yorkshire, which contained 6 pitcher purses, 2 night caps, a watchguard, and 6l. 1s. 4d. Of this money 5l. is to be applied for Missionary purposes, 1s. 4d. for the Orphans, and 1l. as it may be needed. This 1l. I took therefore for the Orphans.
—Yesterday morning I received as a widows mite 1l. for the Orphans; and into the chapel boxes was put 10s. with Eccles. ix. 10, and also half-a-crown anonymously. Thus the Lord has been pleased to send us altogether 2l. 13s., whereby we are able to meet this days expenses.
Feb. 21. We were comfortably helped through yesterday, but having provided for all the demands, there was again nothing left in my hands for today. How kind therefore of the Lord to incline the heart of the same brother, who had given me 50l. a few weeks since, to intrust me with 1l. 2s. 6d. more last night, about nine oclock! By this donation our need for today is supplied.