It is true they are not all so. No, I am told there are but few, and in charity I hope it is [so]. Otherwise what will be my fate seeing I am, in a certain degree, partaker with them? Surely the inhabitants of such a land, at best, cannot look for more than mere present enjoyment. When I reflect seriously on all these things, as I sometimes do, revolving them in every different manner in my mind, it is beyond the power of words to express my feelings. Poor unfortunate, blind creatures! That it is from blindness they commit these things, I am fully persuaded, because I am equally confident that they do not attach that same degree of criminality to them we, from the revealing of the Scriptures to us, do. Some they consider in the light of trifles, some natural, some weaknesses. But all tend to the gratification of most bestial appetites whatever may have been the original cause, curiosity or otherwise.
However, I received a piece of information in one of these, and it was circumstantially detailed, that has cleared a point to me I could never solve. And though I enquired of both Wool and Bob, they were not wiser than myself. Indeed, without the trial or experiment, it seems impossible to say certainly where the cause lies. Now I know it. If ever an opportunity offers, or that it pleases God I again revisit my own lands, I shall be able to speak to a certainty. As I cannot write Latin, I shall say no more of it at present.
A few years back an Indian at the next post above this died. He had been a long time sick, and from this conceived himself ongenay and accordingly prepared for his confession. Having received the details at second and third hand, I shall endeavour to give part of them to you as near their stile as I can. But really I find myself very inadequate to the task. There is a certain poetic sublimity in their language on such like occasions as will not easily meet with credit from those (the better informed) of the civilized world unacquainted with these people. Even amongst ourselves there are but few, for few can judge of the beauties of a language, and most of those few have too high a notion of their own mighty superiority to stoop to regular conversation with them.
But to return—After having revealed all, or most part, of his sins to the company in general, he thus addressed his family in particular:
You see, my children, my distressed state. I cannot move nor stir without assistance. And I feel strengthened in my lungs (breast, heart), merely as it were by permission of my Dreamed, (some particular one he meant) to divulge my offenses to the gods (or God) publicly, before you all, to deter you from the same vices (wickednesses).
I was once a young man also, the same as you are now, healthy and vigorous. Nothing appeared difficult nor dangerous to me. I lived as became a man, and prospered accordingly. But I thought that this proceeded from my own power only. Had I so continued, all had been well! But no, I unfortunately heard speak of such Indians (meaning this place, as my informants tell me), how powerful they were in their medicines, the extraordinary feats they performed. I envied them, and thought that I required but that knowledge more to render me perfect (immortal) and happy. I undertook a voyage to that place. I found that the bare truth had been scarcely told me. I burned with anxiety to become as knowing as themselves, and I was gratified.
Had I rested here, all had yet been well. But in learning their medicines, I also learned of them those vices, those sins, that by their practice have reduced me to this wretched situation.
My sons! Take example from your father! Be good, charitable, and peaceable Indians as I was at the first set off of my life. And employ the same means; indulge, use, the same anxiety to avoid, that I did to procure that information that hath reduced me so far below the level even of a dog. Never forget this. Never indulge even the least desire of such acquisitions. For if you once begin, you will be deluded by their flattery to that destruction I have found. But you are young men! And unless you find grace, you also will be deluded and lost as I am!
I have heard a good deal said of this Indian's confession and exhortations to his sons. They were not lost. He himself lived but a short time and seemed much comforted by it.