Your weak though affectionate brother in Christ,
G. W.
LETTER CXI.
To the Rev. Mr. B.
Philadelphia, Nov. 10, 1739.
Reverend and dear Sir,
YOU have been too kind, and I have been too ungrateful. Business would not permit me to have so much private conversation with you as I ought. Success I fear elated my mind. I did not behave towards you, and other ministers of Christ, with that humility which became me. I freely confess my fault; I own myself to be but a novice. Your charity, dear Sir, will excite you to pray that I may not through pride fall into the condemnation of the devil. Dear Sir, shall I come out into the world again or not? Must I venture myself once more among fire-brands, arrows, and death? Methinks I hear you reply, “Yes, if you come forth in the strength of the Lord God, and make mention of his righteousness only.” It is my desire so to do. I would have Jesus all in all. Like a pure chrystal, I would transmit all the light he poureth upon me. Oh pray, dear Sir, that I may be thus minded, and then, God willing, in about a twelvemonth, I intend visiting the Bristol brethren once again. In the mean while, I hope the Lord will purge me, that I may bring forth more fruit, and work upon me mightily in the inner-man, for otherwise his blessings will prove curses to me. He has been pleased to dig and dung round me, during my retirement; he has shewn me something of the treachery of my own heart, and more and more convinced me that I am the chief of sinners. Oh that my heart may shew forth the eternity and sovereignty of his love! for never surely was there a greater instance of it than myself. Happy are those that are brought to an experimental knowledge of these mysteries of the kingdom of God. Many of your charge have been, I believe; I pray God to increase the number of your spiritual children more and more, and to add daily to the church such as shall be saved. My cordial respects attend your fellow-labourers, and all who are so kind as to ask for me; as fast as opportunity permits, they may expect to hear from, reverend Sir,
Your unworthy brother and fellow-labourer,
G. W.