“No, no,” said he, “your illustration is at fault. He did not faithfully serve his constituency. He was not sound upon the great Grant question.”
The two gentlemen laughed together and filled their glasses.
“No, no,” resumed the General, “never forget that the great thing is drill—discipline. Keep the machinery well oiled, and your hand upon the crank, and all goes well.”
“Until somebody knocks off your hand,” said Abel.
“Yes, of course—of course; but that is the very point. The fight is never among the sheep, but only among the shepherds. Look at our splendid system, beginning with Tom, Jim, and Ned, and culminating in the President—the roots rather red and unsightly, but oh! such a pretty flower, all broadcloth, kid gloves, and affability—contemplate the superb machinery,” continued the General, warming, “the primaries, the ward committees, the—in fact, all the rest of it—see how gloriously it works—the great result of the working of the whole is—”
“To establish justice, insure domestic tranquillity, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity,” interrupted Abel, who had been scanning the Constitution, and who delivered the words with a rhetorical pomp of manner.
General Belch smiled approvingly.
“That’s it—that’s the very tone. You’ll do. The great result is, who shall have his hand on the crank. And there are, therefore, always three parties in our beloved country.”
Abel looked inquiringly.
“First, the ins, who are in two parties—the clique that have, and the clique that haven’t. They fight like fury among themselves, but when they meet t’other great party they all fight together, because the hopes of the crank for each individual of each body lie in the party itself, and in their obedience to its discipline. These are two of the parties. Then there is the great party of the outs, who have a marvelous unanimity, and never break up into quarrelsome bodies until there is a fair chance of their ousting the ins. I say these things not because they are not pretty obvious, but because, as a man of fashion and society, you have probably not attended to such matters. It’s dirty work for a gentleman. But I suppose any of us would be willing to pick a gold eagle out of the mud, even if we did soil our fingers.”