“It isn’t so much what he has done as what he would like to do. I’ve just sustained half-an-hour’s quite paralysing conversation — if you can call it that, for I’m sure I barely uttered — with him, in that grotesque room of his. Sweetie, why the Japanese screen of unparalleled meretriciousness, and why the tropical vegetation?”
“I don’t know. He takes fancies to things, and then he has them moved into his room.”
“But, precious, no one could take a fancy to an aspidistra!” Aubrey objected. “It’s like pampas grass — too dreadfully apocryphal! And is it absolutely necessary to his comfort to place crimson and scarlet side by side? I thought it was a trick of the candle-light last night, but it hit me the rudest blow when I most reluctantly entered the room this morning. Do you suppose that disgusting dog of his has eczema, or just fleas?”
She made a gesture of distaste. “Oh, don’t, Aubrey! I’d rather not talk about it, if you don’t mind.”
“My dear, I do so agree with you! Quite too quelling. But you would never guess the insensate plan he has conceived for my future career! Would you believe it? — I’m to study afforestation!”
“Afforestation!” she repeated blankly.
“Oh, deforestation too! I mean, it’s definitely vertiginous! Couldn’t you have him certified?”
“But are you going to?” she asked.
“Sweet, is it likely? At my time of life, and with my sacred art to consider!”
“Did you tell him so?”