The question was unnecessary, and she knew it was so; but she could not bear the strain of the silence. She seemed to have risen out of the letter he had been writing; and had he not been writing of her—of what concerned them both? How mean and small-hearted he had been, to have thought for an instant that she had not the highest courage, though in going she had done the discreeter, safer thing. But she had come—she had come!
All this was in his eyes, though his face was pale and still. He was almost rigid with emotion, for the ancient habit of repose and self-command of the Quaker people was upon him.
“Can you not see—do you not know?” she repeated, her back upon him now, her face still veiled, her hands making a swift motion of distress.
“Has thee found in the past that thee is so soon forgotten?”
“Oh, do not blame me!” She raised her veil suddenly, and showed a face as pale as his own, and in the eyes a fiery brightness. “I did not know. It was so hard to come—do not blame me. I went to Alexandria—I felt that I must fly; the air around me seemed full of voices crying out. Did you not understand why I went?”
“I understand,” he said, coming forward slowly. “Thee should not have returned. In the way I go now the watchers go also.”
“If I had not come, you would never have understood,” she answered quickly. “I am not sorry I went. I was so frightened, so shaken. My only thought was to get away from the terrible Thing. But I should have been sorry all my life long had I not come back to tell you what I feel, and that I shall never forget. All my life I shall be grateful. You have saved me from a thousand deaths. Ah, if I could give you but one life! Yet—yet—oh, do not think but that I would tell you the whole truth, though I am not wholly truthful. See, I love my place in the world more than I love my life; and but for you I should have lost all.”
He made a protesting motion. “The debt is mine, in truth. But for you I should never have known what, perhaps—” He paused.
His eyes were on hers, gravely speaking what his tongue faltered to say. She looked and looked, but did not understand. She only saw troubled depths, lighted by a soul of kindling purpose. “Tell me,” she said, awed.
“Through you I have come to know—” He paused again. What he was going to say, truthful though it was, must hurt her, and she had been sorely hurt already. He put his thoughts more gently, more vaguely.