He walked briskly down the street past the houses that had been familiar all his life, meeting people who had never been wont to notice him before; and they smiled upon him from afar now; greeted him with enthusiasm, and turned to look after him as he passed on. It gave him a curious feeling to have so much attention from people who had never known him before. It made him feel strangely small, yet filled with a great pride and patriotism for the country that was his, and the government which he now represented to them all. He was something more to them now than just one of the boys about town who had grown up among them. He was a soldier of the United States. He had given his life for the cause of righteousness. The bitterness he might have felt at their former ignoring of him, was all swallowed up in their genuine and hearty friendliness.
He met the white-haired minister, kindly and dignified, who paused to ask him how he liked camp life and to commend him as a soldier; and looking in his strong gentle face John Cameron remembered his resolve.
He flashed a keen look at the gracious countenance and made up his mind to speak:
“I’d like to ask you a question, Doctor Thurlow. It’s been bothering me quite a little ever since this matter of going away to fight has been in my mind. Is there any way that a man—that I can find God? That is, if there is a God. I’ve never thought much about it before, but life down there in camp makes a lot of things seem different, and I’ve been wondering. I’m not sure what I believe. Is there anyway I can find out?”
A pleasant gleam of surprise and delight thrilled into the deep blue eyes of the minister. It was startling. It almost embarrassed him for a moment, it was so unexpected to have a soldier ask a question about God. It was almost mortifying that he had never thought it worth while to take the initiative on that question with the young man.
“Why, certainly!” he said heartily. “Of course, of course. I’m very glad to know you are interested in those things. Couldn’t you come in to my study and talk with me. I think I could help you. I’m sure I could.”
“I haven’t much time,” said Cameron shyly, half ashamed now that he had opened his heart to an almost stranger. He was not even his mother’s minister, and he was a comparative newcomer in the town. How had he come to speak to him so impulsively?
“I understand, exactly, of course,” said the minister with growing eagerness. “Could you come in now for five or ten minutes? I’ll turn back with you and you can stop on your way, or we can talk as we go. Were you thinking of uniting with the church? We have our communion the first Sunday of next month. I should be very glad if you could arrange. We have a number of young people coming in now. I’d like to see you come with them. The church is a good safe place to be. It was established by God. It is a school in which to learn of Him. It is——”
“But I’m not what you would call a Christian!” protested Cameron. “I don’t even know that I believe in the Bible. I don’t know what your church believes. I don’t have a very definite idea what any church believes. I would be a hypocrite to stand up and join a church when I wasn’t sure there was a God.”
“My dear young fellow!” said the minister affectionately. “Not at all! Not at all! The church is the place for young people to come when they have doubts. It is a shelter, and a growing place. Just trust yourself to God and come in among His people and your doubts will vanish. Don’t worry about doubts. Many people have doubts. Just let them alone and put yourself in the right way and you will forget them. I should be glad to talk with you further. I would like to see you come into communion with God’s people. If you want to find God you should come where He has promised to be. It is a great thing to have a fine young fellow like you, and a soldier, array himself on the side of God. I would like to see you stand up on the right side before you go out to meet danger and perhaps death.”