Although this new year brought no actual change to the usual routine of the daily life in the Princess’ home, and although the Princess was able to fulfil her social duties, traces of serious illness now began to show themselves by repeated attacks of exhaustion and weakness. These attacks were partially relieved by a short stay in the Black Forest in June, and by a visit to England and Scotland, which she made without her husband. The Prince had been detained in Germany by the great manœuvres, on the conclusion of which he fetched her from England, in the autumn. On their way back to Darmstadt they stopped at Brussels. They also visited Coblenz, to pay their respects to the Empress of Germany, who had been to see their children at Darmstadt in October.
January 18th, 1876.
No words can express how deep my sympathy and grief is for what our dear Augusta and the Dean have to go through. With her warm, large heart, which ever lived and suffered for others, how great must her pain be in having to leave him! I can positively think of nothing else lately, as you know my love for Augusta, the General [her brother, General Bruce], and Fanny has always been great; and when I think back of them in former times, and in the year 1861, my heart aches and my tears flow—feeling what you and we shall lose in dear Augusta. My pity for the dear, good, kind Dean is so deep. I sent him a few words again to-day, in the hope he may still say a few words of love and gratitude to dear Augusta from me.
Darmstadt, January 22d.
* * * Yesterday morning Ernie came in to me and said, “Mama, I had a beautiful dream; shall I tell you? I dreamt that I was dead and was gone up to Heaven, and there I asked God to let me have Frittie again; and he came to me and took my hand. You were in bed, and saw a great light, and were so frightened, and I said, ‘It is Ernie and Frittie.’ You were so astonished! The next night Frittie and I went with a great light to sisters.” Is it not touching? He says such beautiful things, and has such deep poetic thought, yet with it all so full of fun and romping.
February 9th.
* * * I am so sorry and shocked about excellent Mr. Harrison.[130] What a loss! He was so obliging and kind always in the many commissions for us children. Poor Kräuslach,[131] too—so sad! It is too grievous; how one well-known face—with its many associations—after another, is called away; and on looking back, how short a space of time they seemed to have filled!
Wolfach, June 7th.
* * * The heat here is excessive; the wild flowers covering every field are more beautiful than I have ever seen them anywhere—such quantities of large forget-me-nots. The streams are very much like Scotch ones; the valleys are partly very narrow, and the hills wooded to the very top—rather like the Thüringer Wald, but more different greens: such lovely coloring. I admire the country so much.
Darmstadt, June 23d.