We are going with the children to-day to Wiesbaden until Saturday; and I mean to tell Vicky that she had better give up the hope of my being able to come for the wedding.[135] I could not do it. I only trust the why will be understood. Do write to the dear Empress about it when next you write. How sorry I am to be absent at a moment when, as sister and a German Sovereign’s wife, I should be there; but the doctor would not hear of it, so I gave it up. * * *
Darmstadt, December 21st.
* * * You say all that happened after the dreadful 14th is effaced from your memory. How well I can imagine that! I remember saying my utmost to Sir Charles Phipps in remonstrance to your being wished to leave Windsor—it was so cruel, so very wrong. Uncle Leopold insisted; it all came from him, and he was alarmed lest you should fall ill.
How you suffered was dreadful to witness; never shall I forget what I went through for you then; it tore my heart in pieces; and my own grief was so great too. Louis thought I would not hold to my engagement then any more—for my heart was too filled with beloved, adored Papa, and with your anguish, to have room or wish for other thoughts.
God is very merciful in letting time temper the sharpness of one’s grief, and letting sorrow find its natural place in our hearts, without withdrawing us from life!
THE END.
1878.
“Life is serious—a journey to another end.” (December 12, 1874.)