| PAGE | ||
| [Chap. I.] — | To the Votaries of Jugernāth | 1 |
| [II.] — | The Blasphemer | 2 |
| [III.] — | What is Jugernāth? | 4 |
| [IV.] — | A few ugly Facts | 6 |
| [V.] — | Axioms for Jugernāthians | 9 |
| [VI.] — | Political Economy | 12 |
| [VII.] — | Political Extravagance | 17 |
| [VIII.] — | False Prophets of Jugernāth | 21 |
| [IX.] — | Isolation of Jugernāth | 24 |
| [X.] — | Treachery in the Camp | 29 |
| [XI.] — | Quem Jupiter vult perdere prius dementat | 33 |
| [XII.] — | The wages of Jugernāth | 35 |
| [XIII.] — | Pauperism, Crime, and Intemperance | 37 |
| [XIV.] — | Jugernāth afloat | 41 |
| [XV.] — | Adverse Prosperity | 43 |
| [XVI.] — | Sacred Rights of Property | 47 |
| [XVII.] — | Selections from Jugernāth’s Sacred Writings | 51 |
| [XVIII.] — | The Vampire | 54 |
| [XIX.] — | Odimus quos læsimus | 59 |
| [XX.] — | Prosperous Adversity | 63 |
| [XXI.] — | Ireland under the wheels | 64 |
| [XXII.] — | The Finishing Stroke | 68 |
| [XXIII.] — | Little Greatness | 71 |
| [XXIV.] — | Blunder and Plunder | 73 |
| [XXV.] — | Dear Cheap Food | 77 |
| [XXVI.] — | The Pagoda tree | 81 |
| [XXVII.] — | I know a Maiden fair to see | 85 |
| [Appendix I.] — | Discourtesy versus Argument | 89 |
| [” II.] — | Unheeded Warning | 96 |
THE BRITISH JUGERNATH.
[CHAPTER I.]
TO THE VOTARIES OF JUGERNATH.
My Idolatrous Compatriot! Were it not for the gravity of the situation, it would be amusing to watch the self-complacent smile of conscious superiority which you assume, when descanting on the paternal character of our rule in suppressing such abuses as those of Suttee and Jugernāth; unconscious at the same time that the Jugernāth of the wretched Hindoo is dwarfed into complete insignificance when compared with that huge idol which you yourself have set up for worship.
My dear fellow! for goodness’ sake put away the microscope with which you are so patiently investigating the mote in the eye of your Aryan brother, and bear with me, whilst I attempt to extract the huge log which obscures your own visual organs. And should I (contrary to my expectation), succeed in removing so large a mass, you will find that, whilst you have been depriving your Aryan brethren of their comparatively innocent little plaything, which at the most might have crushed some half dozen fanatics, in the course of a year, you have reared up a horrible fantastic creation which you worship, which in its progress is crushing its thousands and even millions every year; which is stamping out the lifeblood of England and its dependencies; whilst all the time you are applauding it, sounding your political tom-toms, blowing your trumpets to shouts of wah! wah! complacently misapplying glib quotations from your sacred Vedas (Adam Smith and Mill), flaunting your banners of political economy while violating every principle of that useful but misused science.