When Rutland ceased the fire was out in the grate, and a clock in a nearby steeple was striking the hour of two. A shiver passed through his body as he rose and laid his violin tenderly upon the table. Hastily blowing out the light, he threw himself upon the narrow cot, and drew over him the two thin blankets. At length the outcast slept, and for a time the fierce agony of heart and mind troubled him no more.
CHAPTER II
THE VERGE OF TREMBLING
When the news of Martin Rutland's ignominy reached Beryl Heathcote all the light and joy passed out of her life. At first she could not believe it possible, and hoped against hope that there had been some terrible mistake. In a few days, however, she had to realise that it was only too true, and that the man in whom she had trusted so implicitly was an outcast not only from society but from the Church as well. She tried to bear up and face the storm which raged so furiously in the parish. On every side she was forced to listen to the most scathing denunciations of the deposed clergyman. People seemed to take a fiendish delight in calling upon her to discuss the affair and to express their undesired sympathy. No word of blame or complaint passed her lips. At first she cherished the feeble hope that Martin would either return or write to her, that he would prove himself innocent. But as the days slowly edged into weeks, and no word came, a heavy despair settled upon her. The strain proved too much to bear, and she succumbed to a long serious illness, from which it was believed at one time that she could not recover.
When at last she was able to sit up she was but the shadow of her former happy buoyant self. "Oh, if I had only died!" she moaned. "What a relief it would have been. How can I face life again with this terrible weight upon my heart!"
When she was stronger she became determined to leave Glendale, the Gethsemane of her young life, and to go where she would no longer hear the story of shame, and where curious eyes would not follow her whenever she moved abroad.
Her only sister lived in a western city and thither she made her way. What a relief it was to her burdened heart to have the comfort of her sister's love. Here she could rest and endeavour to gather up as far as possible the tangled and broken threads of her life.
This, however, she found to be most difficult, and months passed before she was able to compose her mind and think of the future. She felt that she should be doing something, and thus not depend upon others. To return to her old home to the love and attention which would be hers there she could not. She must remain away from the scene of her great sorrow.
In work, Beryl believed, she could in a measure forget herself. But what work could she do? Music was the only thing in which she had been thoroughly trained. But the idea of turning to it now, and taking in pupils, was most repugnant. Not since that night when she had played in her old home, when Martin Rutland was watching longingly through the window, had she touched the keys of any instrument. Neither had she sung a single note. Music had passed out of her life, and the clear sweet voice which had thrilled the hearts of so many was stilled.