HOME AT LAST.
Manning was too far reduced by his prison life to be of further use in the army; moreover, active campaigning was at an end; and he was honorably discharged, June 16, 1865, after nearly four years of such service as few even of the Union soldiers in the late war were called to. Returning to his Massachusetts home, his first effort was to rebuild his health. A visit to the West refreshed him, and he hoped for ultimate recovery. Investing his army earnings for the benefit of his home loved ones, he looked about him for something to do. He had not forgotten his promise to God in Macon jail: his only doubt was how he could best redeem it.
TELLING HIS STORY.—FULFILLING HIS VOW.
Visiting an army comrade in North Bridgewater, Manning met the Rev. S. H. Lee, now of Greenfield, who counselled him to attempt studying for the ministry; and, that he might procure funds to start with, Mr. Lee suggested his preparing a lecture on his army service and prison adventures, to deliver as opportunity offered, until the proceeds of it should amount to one hundred dollars, when he could hopefully commence school-life, and thenceforward work his way along through a course of study. The lecture was prepared, and, under Mr. Lee's auspices, brought out at North Bridgewater. It was repeated a score of times or so, during the winter of 1865-6, with good success. It is much to be regretted that no copy of this manuscript was retained; for Manning wrote with no little graphic power, and such a record of his eventful soldier-life would have proved of thrilling interest now.
STUDENT-LIFE AT ANDOVER.—LOVING SERVICE FOR JESUS.
In the spring of 1866, he was on his way to Phillips Academy, Andover, with the one hundred dollars in hand,—or rather with one hundred and one dollars; and, as he had been advised to start with one hundred, he gave the odd dollar to a poor man on the road. At Andover, while an earnest student, he was an untiring Christian worker. He taught in a mission-school, took part in prayer-meetings, and conversed on the subject of personal religion with many school-mates, winning thus friends to himself and souls to Jesus. His life really seemed—as he had promised it should be—wholly consecrate to Jesus. "Way down in the inmost recesses of my heart," he wrote, "the great all-absorbing purpose and desire is to do the will of God as it is made known to me by his providence.... I desire to be led by the hand of God.... I wish to do away with every selfish thought, and live only for Jesus." Yet he worked from no mere sense of stern duty, in the slavish performance of a binding vow: love prompted his service, out of a willing heart. "How much real enjoyment it gives me to work for Jesus!" he said. "All other pleasures fade away and are lost, by the side of it." And this enjoyment in work for Jesus was increased by the conviction that souls were benefited by it. He loved to work for others, because Jesus commanded it; and he loved to work for Jesus, because others were blessed by it. "You know," he said, "the words of our Saviour are, 'Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.' How soothing and encouraging these words are! I don't see how any one can help doing all the good they can.... I have an insatiable thirst after perishing souls, and hope and pray that God will lead me to do good wherever I am.... I am thankful for the hope that, perhaps ere long, I can throw aside all other things, and enter with my whole heart upon the work of saving souls.... My heart pants to be wholly engaged in my Master's service."
TOIL FOR BREAD.—UNFAILING TRUST.
One hundred dollars will not go far towards a young man's thorough education, nowadays; and Manning found himself before long pressed for means of support. Then he was driven to work hard for money, while toiling incessantly at study. He swept the school-rooms, and performed similar service at the academy, for fifteen cents an hour; he went out in the early mornings to do mowing and other farm labor, until the hour of school-time; and thus he kept along in every thing but health and rest. He had no odd hours unimproved. Writing of his mission-scholars, in whom he was deeply interested, he said, "I generally spend two evenings a week with them, and two evenings at literary societies for improvement of the mind, and there are not often but three evenings left, and those are our prayer-meeting nights."
Had Manning been in full health, he might have stood all this; but disease, fastened on him in the prison stockade, never relaxed its hold; and his strength failed steadily. Some of his friends advised him to abandon student-life and seek renewed vigor in active out-door occupation; but others, who were nearest him, with unaccountable blindness and persistency, uniformly urged his adherence to first-formed plans. Again and again his enfeebled frame gave way; and as often his unwavering determination enabled him to rally for another effort. It was hard for him to relinquish his purpose of activity in Christ's service. He was far from wilful in this struggle. "I desire to be led by the hand of God," he said; "I am praying very earnestly, ... asking God to tell me what to do, and I know he will not tell me wrong.... Feeling that I am performing my mission here on earth, I take every step gladly;" but he wanted to take some step, not to stand still: it was easier for him to do any thing for Christ than to do nothing. "I will endeavor," he wrote, "to keep within bounds, and not try to strain my rope when I find I have arrived at the end of it;" but he was loath to believe there was any end to his rope. "God willing, I shall be able to do something by and by," he said, "and what shall it be?" He had the feeling that God, having accepted his consecration vow in prison, would somehow find work for him to do for Jesus, in accordance with its terms. No lesson concerning God's "kingly state" seemed so hard for him to learn as that—
"They also serve who only stand and wait."