Again, and by way of postscript No. 2, concentrate your mind upon sweetbreads. Sweetbreads are made in Chicago of the pancreases of horned cattle. From Portland to Portland they belong to the first class of refined delicatessen. And yet, on the human plane, the pancreas is in Class VI, along with the cæcum and the paunch. And, contrariwise, there is tripe—“the stomach of the ox or of some other ruminant.” The stomach of an American citizen belongs to Class II, and even the stomach of an Englishman is in Class IV, but tripe is far down in Class VIII. And chitterlings—the excised vermiform appendix of the cow. Of all the towns in Christendom, Richmond, Va., is the only one wherein a self-respecting white man would dare to be caught wolfing a chitterling in public.
XI.—THE JAZZ WEBSTER
XI. The Jazz Webster
Actor. One handicapped more by a wooden leg than by a wooden head.
Adultery. Democracy applied to love.
Alimony. The ransom that the happy pay to the devil.
Anti-Vivisectionist. One who gags at a guinea-pig and swallows a baby.
Archbishop. A Christian ecclesiastic of a rank superior to that attained by Christ.