A passionate woman's happineſs is never in her own keeping: it is the ſport of accident, and the ſlave of events. It is in the power of her acquaintance, her ſervants, but chiefly of her enemies, and all her comforts lie at the mercy of others. So far from being willing to learn of him who was meek and lowly, ſhe conſiders meekneſs as the want of a becoming ſpirit, and lowlineſs as a deſpicable and vulgar meanneſs. And an imperious woman will ſo little covet the ornament of a meek and quiet ſpirit, that it is almoſt the only ornament ſhe will not be ſolicitous to wear. But reſentment is a very expenſive vice. How dearly has it coſt its votaries, even from the ſin of Cain, the firſt offender in this kind! "It is cheaper (ſays a pious writer) to forgive, and ſave the charges."
If it were only for mere human reaſons, it would turn to a better account to be patient; nothing defeats the malice of an enemy like a ſpirit of forbearance; the return of rage for rage cannot be ſo effectually provoking. True gentleneſs, like an impenetrable armour, repels the moſt pointed ſhafts of malice: they cannot pierce through this invulnerable ſhield, but either fall hurtleſs to the ground, or return to wound the hand that ſhot them.
A meek ſpirit will not look out of itſelf for happineſs, becauſe it finds a conſtant banquet at home; yet, by a ſort of divine alchymy, it will convert all external events to its own profit, and be able to deduce ſome good, even from the moſt unpromiſing: it will extract comfort and ſatiſfaction from the moſt barren circumſtances: "It will ſuck honey out of the rock, and oil out of the flinty rock."
But the ſupreme excellence of this complacent quality is, that it naturally diſpoſes the mind where it reſides, to the practice of every other that is amiable. Meekneſs may be called the pioneer of all the other virtues, which levels every obſtruction, and ſmooths every difficulty that might impede their entrance, or retard their progreſs.
The peculiar importance and value of this amiable virtue may be farther ſeen in its permanency. Honours and dignities are tranſient, beauty and riches frail and fugacious, to a proverb. Would not the truly wiſe, therefore, wiſh to have ſome one poſſeſſion, which they might call their own in the ſevereſt exigencies? But this wiſh can only be accompliſhed by acquiring and maintaining that calm and abſolute ſelf-poſſeſſion, which, as the world had no hand in giving, ſo it cannot, by the moſt malicious exertion of its power, take away.
THOUGHTS
on the
CULTIVATION
of the
HEART and TEMPER
in the
EDUCATION of DAUGHTERS.
I have not the fooliſh preſumption to imagine, that I can offer any thing new on a ſubject, which has been ſo ſucceſſfully treated by many learned and able writers. I would only, with all poſſible deference, beg leave to hazard a few ſhort remarks on that part of the ſubject of education, which I would call the education of the heart. I am well aware, that this part alſo has not been leſs ſkilfully and forcibly diſcuſſed than the reſt, though I cannot, at the ſame time, help remarking, that it does not appear to have been ſo much adopted into common practice.
It appears then, that notwithſtanding the great and real improvements, which have been made in the affair of female education, and notwithſtanding the more enlarged and generous views of it, which prevail in the preſent day, that there is ſtill a very material defect, which it is not, in general, enough the object of attention to remove. This defect ſeems to conſiſt in this, that too little regard is paid to the diſpoſitions of the mind, that the indications of the temper are not properly cheriſhed, nor the affections of the heart ſufficiently regulated.
In the firſt education of girls, as far as the cuſtoms which faſhion eſtabliſhes are right, they ſhould undoubtedly be followed. Let the exterior be made a conſiderable object of attention, but let it not be the principal, let it not be the only one.—Let the graces be induſtriouſly cultivated, but let them not be cultivated at the expence of the virtues.—Let the arms, the head, the whole perſon be carefully poliſhed, but let not the heart be the only portion of the human anatomy, which ſhall be totally overlooked.
The neglect of this cultivation ſeems to proceed as much from a bad taſte, as from a falſe principle. The generality of people form their judgment of education by ſlight and ſudden appearances, which is certainly a wrong way of determining. Muſic, dancing, and languages, gratify thoſe who teach them, by perceptible and almoſt immediate effects; and when there happens to be no imbecillity in the pupil, nor deficiency in the matter, every ſuperficial obſerver can, in ſome meaſure, judge of the progreſs.—The effects of moſt of theſe accompliſhments addreſs themſelves to the ſenſes; and there are more who can ſee and hear, than there are who can judge and reflect.