Now although I was then in no wise prepared for confession, and though in my lifetime it had never come into my thoughts, but I had always for mere shame feared it as the devil fears holy water, yet at that moment I felt in me such repentance for my sins and such a desire to do penance and to lead a better life that forthwith I asked for a confessor; at which sudden conversion and amendment of life Herzbruder rejoiced greatly; for he had perceived and well knew that so far I had belonged to no religion. Thereafter I openly professed myself of the Catholic Church, went to confession and to mass after absolution received, with all which I felt so light and easy at my heart that 'tis not to be expressed: and what is most marvellous is this, that the devil in the possessed man henceforward left me in peace, whereas before my confession and absolution he cast up against me certain knaveries I had committed, with such particularities as he had been ordained for naught else but to point out my sins: yet the hearers believed him not, as being a liar, especially since my honourable pilgrim's dress shewed me in another light.
In this gracious place we abode fourteen days, and there I thanked God for my conversion, and marked the miracles that were there done: all which did incite me to some shew of piety and godliness. Yet did the same last but as long as it might: for even as my conversion took its beginning, not from love of God but from dread and fear of damnation, so did I by degrees become lukewarm and slothful, because I little by little forgot the terror that the Evil One had struck into me. So when we had sufficiently viewed the relics of the saints, the vestments, and other remarkable things of the abbey, we betook ourselves to Baden, there to spend the winter.
Chap. iii.: HOW THE TWO FRIENDS SPENT THE WINTER
There did I hire a cheerful parlour and a chamber for us, such as the visitors to the baths do commonly use to have, especially in summer: which be mostly rich Switzers that do resort here more to pass the time and make a show than to take baths for any disease. So also I bargained for our food, and Herzbruder, seeing how princely I began, counselled me frugality, and reminded me of the long hard winter that we had yet to pass, for he dreamt not that my money would hold out so long; and I should need all I had, he said, for the spring when we should depart: for much money was soon spent if one ever took from it and never added to it: 'twas blown away like smoke and was certain never to return, etc. At such loyal counsel I could no longer conceal from Herzbruder how rich my treasury was, and how I was minded to spend it for the good of both of us, since its extraction and growth were so unholy that I could not think to buy lands with it; and even if I were not minded to spend it so as to maintain so my best friend on earth, yet it were but right that he, Herzbruder, should enjoy Oliver's money in revenge for the insult he had before received from him before Magdeburg. And when I knew myself to be in all safety, I drew off my two shoulder-bags, divided the ducats and pistoles, and said to Herzbruder he might dispose of this money at will, and spend and disburse it as he would, so that it might best profit us both.
When he saw, besides the greatness of my faith in him, how much the money was, with which I, without him, could have been a pretty rich man, "Brother," says he, "since I have known thee thou hast done naught but shew thy constant love and truth to meward. But tell me, how thinkest thou that I can ever repay thee? I speak not of the money, for this perchance might in time be repaid, but of thy love and faith, and especially of the exceeding trust thou hast in me, which is not to be estimated. In a word, brother, thy noble soul doth make me thy slave, and the favour thou shewest me is more easy to admire than to repay. O honest Simplicissimus, into whose mind it never entereth (even in these godless days in which the world is full of knavery) to think how poor, needy Herzbruder might with this fair stock of money make off and in his place leave thee in want! Of a surety, brother, this proof of true friendship bindeth me more to thee than if a rich lord should give me thousands. Only I beg thee, my brother, remain master guardian and steward of thine own money. For me 'tis enough that thou art my friend."
To this I answered, "What strange discourses be these, my honoured Herzbruder? Ye give me to understand ye are much bounden to me, and yet will ye not see to it that I spend not my money vainly and to your damage and mine!" And so we disputed with one another childishly enough, because each was drunken with love of the other: thus was Herzbruder made at once my steward, my treasurer, my servant, and my master: and in our time of leisure he told me of his life and by what means he was known and promoted by Count Götz, whereupon I told him how I had fared since his father (of pious memory) died: for until then we had never had so much time. But when he heard I had a young wife in Lippstadt, he did reprove me that I had not repaired to her rather than with him to Switzerland, for that had been more fitting, and was my duty moreover: and when I would excuse myself, that I could not find it in my heart to leave him, my best friend, in misery, he persuaded me to write to my wife and tell her of my condition, with the promise to visit her as soon as might be: to that I did add excuses for my long absence, namely, all manner of contrarious happenings, though greatly I had desired to be with her long ere now.
Meanwhile Herzbruder, learning from the public prints that it stood well with General Count Götz, and that in particular he would succeed in his vindication before his Imperial Majesty, would be set free, and even again receive command of an army, sent an account of how he stood to that general at Vienna, and wrote also to the Bavarian army on the score of his baggage that he had there: yea, and began to hope his fortunes would again flourish. Upon which we concluded to part in the spring, he going to the said count, and I to my wife at Lippstadt: yet not to pass the winter in idleness we did learn from an engineer to make more fortifications on paper than the kings of France and Spain together could build: so too I made acquaintance with certain alchymists that, because they saw I had money at my back, would teach me to make gold, an I would but bear the expense of it: yea, and I do believe they had persuaded me thereto had not Herzbruder given them their congé, saying that he that possessed such an art would not need to go about like a beggar, nor to ask others for money.
But though Herzbruder did receive from Vienna a gracious answer from the said count and fine promises, I heard no single word from Lippstadt, though on several post-days I did write in duplicate. Which put me in ill humour and was the cause that that spring I went not to Westphalia, but obtained from Herzbruder that he should take me with him to Vienna and let me share in his hoped-for good fortune. So with my money we equipped ourselves like two cavaliers, both in clothing, horses, servants, and arms, and travelled by Constance to Ulm, where we embarked upon the Danube, and from thence in eight days came safely to Vienna.
Chap. iv.; IN WHAT MANNER SIMPLICISSIMUS AND HERZBRUDER WENT TO THE WARS AGAIN AND RETURNED THENCE
Things be strangely ordered in this changeful world; 'Tis said he that should know all things would soon be rich: but I say he that always could seize his opportunity would soon be great and powerful. For many a skinflint or cheese-parer (both which honourable titles are given to misers) gets rich enough by knowing and using some knack of gain: yet is he not therefore great, but is and remaineth always of less estimation than when he was poor: but he that can make himself great and powerful, him riches follow after close. So did luck, that is wont to give power and riches, look on me favourably for once, and gave me when I had been some eight days in Vienna opportunity in hand to mount upon the rungs of fame without hindrance: yet I did it not. And why? I hold 'twas because my fate had willed for me another road, namely, that along which my foolishness did lead me.