_A clergyman who had several livings was under discussion. "Why, such fellows look at a cure of souls like a cure of herrings—so much per hundred."
"Ah, but the herring cures fulfil their contract," said Jerrold.
He called clerical pluralists_ polypi, parsons with many stomachs and no hearts.
* * * * *
A young prince had just been born and they were firing royal salutes to celebrate the occasion. A bystander exclaimed, "How they do powder these babies!"
* * * * *
In a pompous speech of self-defence the orator wound up by declaring himself the guardian of his own honour. "What a sinecure!" murmured his opponent.
"How do you like babies, Mr. Lamb?" cried the gushing mother.
"Boi-boi-boiled," answered the stammering old bachelor.
* * * * *