The acquisition of a mere book-knowledge, however desirable, will avail you but little, unless you acquire at the same time correct habits and principles, united with refinement of manners. The world will be likely to take your personal appearance, your style of dress and address, as the true index of your character, and whether deceived at first view or not, will finally estimate you at your true value. In perfecting your education, it is not to be expected that you are to master every branch of human learning, but rather that you are to make your life a life of thought, of study, of observation, of strife to excel in all that is good, and in doing good.
In attempting to achieve great things in the world, you must not overlook little things,—little attentions, little civilities due to others with whom you may come in contact; for your claims to consideration will be estimated by the character of your conduct in social life. There are certain conventionalities recognized in good society which you must respect, and to which you must conform, if you would be well received. Your manners and habits are therefore of vital importance as elements of character.
It has been truly said that man is a "bundle of habits." It may be said with equal truth that our own worst enemies are "bad habits." We all know that bad habits fasten themselves upon us, as it were, by stealth; and though we may not perceive the influence which they exert over us, yet other persons perceive it, remark it, and judge us accordingly. The formation of correct habits in early life is comparatively easy, while the correction of bad habits, when once formed, is always difficult, especially in more advanced years. In a word, if you would become model characters, you must discard all bad habits, all odd habits, all that is ungracious or ungraceful in word, deed, or manner, and make it the leading rule of your life to observe the proprieties of life in all places and under all circumstances. In order to achieve all this, it is indispensable that you should study yourselves, watch yourselves, criticise yourselves, and know yourselves as others know you. The value of self-examination has been forcibly as well as beautifully expressed in a single stanza by Robert Burns,—
"O wad some power the giftie gie us
To see oursel's as ithers see us!
It wad frae monie a blunder free us,
An' foolish notion:
What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,
An' ev'n devotion!"
It is true that in relation to the laws of etiquette many books have been written, which are in fact more read than observed, and which are more perplexing than practical. No lady or gentleman was ever made truly polite, truly agreeable, truly amiable, by a strict observance of artificial rules. Something more is needed; something must be done. It is in the heart, in the exercise of all the moral and Christian virtues, that true politeness has its foundation. True politeness is never selfish, never ostentatious, but always overflowing with kindness, always angelic in its attributes. In word and deed, it is always considerate, delicate, and graceful; yet in its ministrations it always preserves its own self-respect, while it manifests its sincere respect for all that is good and for all that is meritorious.