“Women are always harder on women than men are,” said a fur-sewer, an intelligent American about thirty. “I got tired of always sitting, and took a place as chambermaid. The work was all right and the wages good, but I’ll tell you what I couldn’t stand. The cook and the waitress were just common, uneducated Irish, and I had to room with one and stand the personal habits of both, and the way they did at table took all my appetite. I couldn’t eat, and began to run down; and at last I gave notice, and told the truth when I was asked why. The lady just looked at me astonished: ‘If you take a servant’s place, you can’t expect to be one of the family,’ she said. ‘I never asked it,’ I said; ‘all I ask is a chance at common decency.’ ‘It will be difficult to find an easier place than this,’ she said, and I knew it; but ease one way was hardness another, and she couldn’t see that I had any right to complain. That’s one trouble in the way. It’s the mixing up of things, and mistresses don’t think how they would feel in the same place.”
Third came an Irish-American whose mother had been cook for years in one family, but who had, after a few months of service, gone into a jute-mill, followed gradually by five sisters.
“I hate the very words ‘service’ and ‘servant,’” she said. “We came to this country to better ourselves, and it’s not bettering to have anybody ordering you round.”
“But you are ordered in the mill.”
“That’s different. A man knows what he wants, and doesn’t go beyond it; but a woman never knows what she wants, and sort of bosses you everlastingly. If there was such a thing as fixed hours it might be different, but I tell every girl I know, ‘Whatever you do, don’t go into service. You’ll always be prisoners and always looked down on.’ You can do things at home for them as belongs to you that somehow it seems different to do for strangers. Anyway, I hate it, and there’s plenty like me.”
“What I minded,” said a gentle, quiet girl, who worked at a stationer’s, and who had tried household service for a year,—“what I minded was the awful lonesomeness. I went for general housework, because I knew all about it, and there were only three in the family. I never minded being alone evenings in my own room, for I’m always reading or something, and I don’t go out hardly at all, but then I always know I can, and that there is somebody to talk to if I like. But there, except to give orders, they had nothing to do with me. It got to feel sort of crushing at last. I cried myself sick, and at last I gave it up, though I don’t mind the work at all. I know there are good places, but the two I tried happened to be about alike, and I sha’n’t try again. There are a good many would feel just the same.”
“Oh, nobody need to tell me about poor servants,” said an energetic woman of forty, Irish-American, and for years in a shirt factory. “Don’t I know the way the hussies’ll do, comin’ out of a bog maybe, an’ not knowing the names even, let alone the use, of half the things in the kitchen, and asking their twelve and fourteen dollars a month? Don’t I know it well, an’ the shame it is to ’em! but I know plenty o’ decent, hard-workin’ girls too, that give good satisfaction, an’ this is what they say. They say the main trouble is, the mistresses don’t know, no more than babies, what a day’s work really is. A smart girl keeps on her feet all the time to prove she isn’t lazy, for if the mistress finds her sitting down, she thinks there can’t be much to do and that she doesn’t earn her wages. Then if a girl tries to save herself or is deliberate, they call her slow. They want girls on tap from six in the morning till ten and eleven at night. ’Tisn’t fair. And then, if there’s a let-up in the work, maybe they give you the baby to see to. I like a nice baby, but I don’t like having one turned over to me when I’m fit to drop scrabbling to get through and sit down a bit. I’ve naught to say for the girls that’s breaking things and half doing the work. They’re a shameful set, and ought to be put down somehow; but it’s a fact that the most I’ve known in service have been another sort that stayed long in places and hated change. There’s many a good place too, but the bad ones outnumber ’em. Women make hard mistresses, and I say again, I’d rather be under a man, that knows what he wants. That’s the way with most.”
“I don’t see why people are surprised that we don’t rush into places,” said a shop-girl. “Our world may be a very narrow world, and I know it is; but for all that, it’s the only one we’ve got, and right or wrong, we’re out of it if we go into service. A teacher or cashier or anybody in a store, no matter if they have got common-sense, doesn’t want to associate with servants. Somehow you get a sort of smooch. Young men think and say, for I have heard lots of them, ‘Oh, she can’t amount to much if she hasn’t brains enough to make a living outside of a kitchen!’ You’re just down once for all if you go into one.”
“I don’t agree with you at all,” said a young teacher who had come with her. “The people that hire you go into kitchens and are not disgraced. What I felt was, for you see I tried it, that they oughtn’t to make me go into livery. I was worn out with teaching, and so I concluded to try being a nurse for a while. I found two hard things: one, that I was never free for an hour from the children, for I took meals and all with them, and any mother knows what a rest it is to go quite away from them, even for an hour; and the other was that she wanted me to wear the nurse’s cap and apron. She was real good and kind; but when I said, ‘Would you like your sister, Miss Louise, to put on cap and apron when she goes out with them?’ she got very red, and straightened up. ‘It’s a very different matter,’ she said; ‘you must not forget that in accepting a servant’s place you accept a servant’s limitations.’ That finished me. I loved the children, but I said, ‘If you have no other thought of what I am to the children than that, I had better go.’ I went, and she put a common, uneducated Irish girl in my place. I know a good many who would take nurse’s places, and who are sensible enough not to want to push into the family life. But the trouble is that almost every one wants to make a show, and it is more stylish to have the nurse in a cap and apron, and so she is ordered into them.”
“I’ve tried it,” said one who had been a dressmaker and found her health going from long sitting. “My trouble was, no conscience as to hours; and I believe you’ll find that is, at the bottom, one of the chief objections. My first employer was a smart, energetic woman, who had done her own work when she was first married and knew what it meant, or you’d think she might have known. But she had no more thought for me than if I had been a machine. She’d sit in her sitting-room on the second floor and ring for me twenty times a day to do little things, and she wanted me up till eleven to answer the bell, for she had a great deal of company. I had a good room and everything nice, and she gave me a great many things, but I’d have spared them all if only I could have had a little time to myself. I was all worn out, and at last I had to go. There was another reason. I had no place but the kitchen to see my friends. I was thirty years old and as well born and well educated as she, and it didn’t seem right. The mistresses think it’s all the girls’ fault, but I’ve seen enough to know that women haven’t found out what justice means, and that a girl knows it, many a time, better than her employer. Anyway, you couldn’t make me try it again.”