Brite and Fair

by Henry A. Shute

July 12, Keene and Cele and i washed the winders upstairs today. i had to lug about 2 million pales of water. i asted mother what was the use of washing the upstairs winders for him as he wasent going to stay over nite. father he sed if we fed him two mutch he mite have the collick and have to be put to bed and perhaps stay 2 weaks. he sed we must be cairful and not feed him to hy.

July 13, brite and fair, we washed the downstairs winders today. darn the minister ennyway.

July 14, brite and fair of coarse. sunday went to chirch of coarse, also sunday school. more tuf luck. the minister cant come Friday but will come Thirsday so he will have a hoal evening with us. gosh.

July 15, had to raik up the yard. i aint been fishing hardly this summer. darn the minister.

July 16, or ennywhere else eether. today i had to cleen the barn and woodshed and pile the wood up neet. i wonder who they think is entertaneing the minister ennyway. darn him to darnation. i hoap nobody will ever see this diry.

July 17. we are all nerly ded. mother and aunt Sarah has been cooking all day. Keene and Cele have been practising hynm tunes and i of coarse have did most all the wirk. Pewt and Beany come over tonite and fixed up what we shall do to the minister. jest you wait and see old mister minister. i bet mother wil be glad and Aunt Sarah two. Tomorrow the minister comes. i bet he will wish he dident.

July 18, brite and fair. we have had a grate time. i never had sutch a time in my life. i gess nobody ever did befoar. everyone is in bed xausted but me. they think i am in bed but i am wrighting this. last nite me and Beany and Pewt talked over what we shood do to the minister. i told them what father done to old man Ellis and Pewt wanted to do that but i thot perhaps i mite not get the rite chair to put the bumblebeas in and if father set on them i mite as well run away to sea. then peeple has been knowed to tare off their britches when they are stang by the hornits and bumblebeas and if the minister done that it would be very mortifiing to my mother and my aunt Sarah and my sisters Keene and Cele.

so we desided that woodent be proper althoug we wanted to like time. then Beany wanted to put a live snaik in his hat, but we desided the snaik wood scare mother and my aunt Sarah and my two sisters to deth. then Pewt he sed less dig up some of those red stink wirms behine the barn and put a handfull in his hat. you know they smell so that you have to use soft soap and sand and scrub your hands 2 or 3 days before you can get it off. so neether of us wanted to tuch one.

then i sed mother is going to set the table and put on all the chicken and gelly and butter and cake and creem and everything and cover them with the fli screens and shet the doors and have nobody go in until super is ready. super is to be at six and she is going to have evrything ready at five and then they are all going upstairs and dress up in their best and curl Celes hair and ty up Keenes hair with a red ribon becaus her hair wont curl and dress Georgie and Annie and Frank and the baby and maik father put on a cleen coler and shert and black his boots and promise to be cairful not to say ennything that would shok the minister, so i sed less go in the kitchen and ketch about 2 million flise and put them under the fli screnes, and they sed i was a buster to think it up.

well at five oh clock the table was all set and it looked fine. i never see it look so good. so after the folks had went up stairs me and Pewt and Beany clim into the kitchen and cougt a bushel of flise and tiptode into the dining room and lifted up the screnes and put them under. after we had prety near filled the screnes we tiptode out.