After this the D—n runs into a whimsical Description of his Heroes personal Virtues; but draws the Picture too much Alla Carraccatura, and is, in my Opinion, not only a little too familiar, but wide of his Subject. For begging his Deanship’s Pardon, he mightily betrays his Judgment, when he says, Sir John was no very great Scholar, whereas all Men of Learning allow him to be a most excellent one; but as we may suppose he grew pretty warm by this Time with the Booksellers Wine, he got into his old Knack of Raillery, and begins to run upon all Mankind: In this Mood he falls upon C—— J——n, and Sir R—— Bl——re, a pair of twin Poets, who suck’d one and the same Muse. After
this he has a Fling at Handel, Bononcini and Attilio, the Opera Composers; and a severe Sneer on the late High-Church Idol, Sacheverel. As for Cluer, the Printer, any Body that knows Music, or Bow Church Yard, needs no farther Information.
And now he proceeds to a Digression, which is indeed the Dissertation it self; proving all Arts and Sciences to owe their Origin and Existence to Pudding and Dumpling (i. e.) Encouragement. His Hiatus in the [20th Page], I could, but dare not Decypher.
In his [22nd Page], he lashes the Authors who oppose the Government; such as the Craftsman, Occasional Writer, and other Scribblers, past, present, and to come. The Dumpling-Eaters Downfal, is a Title of his own Imagination; I have run over all Wilford’s Catalogues, and see no Mention made of such a Book: All that Paragraph therefore is a mere Piece of Rablaiscism.
In his [23d Page], he has another confounded Fling at Foreigners; and after having determinately dubb’d his Hero, the Prince of Statesmen, he concludes his Dissertation with a Mess of Drollery, and goes off in a Laugh.
In a Word, the whole Dissertation seems calculated to ingratiate the D—n in Sir **** Favour; he draws the Picture of an able and an honest Minister, painful in his Countries Service, and beloved by his Prince; yet oftentimes misrepresented and bely’d: Nay, sometimes on the Brink of Ruin, but always Conqueror. The Fears, the Jealousies, the Misrepresentations of an enraged and disappointed Party, give him no small Uneasiness to see the Ingratitude of some Men, the Folly of others, who shall believe black to be white, because prejudiced and designing Knaves alarm ’em with false Fears. We see every Action misconstrued, and Evil made out of Good; but as the best
Persons and Things are subject to Scandal and Ridicule; so have they the Pleasure of Triumphing in the Truth, which always will prevail.
I take the Allegory of this Dissertation to be partly Historical, partly Prophetical; the D—n seeming to have carried his View, not only to the present, but even, succeeding Times. He sets his Hero down at last in Peace, Plenty, and a happy Retirement, not unrelented by his Prince; his Honesty apparent, his Enemies baffled and confounded, and his Measures made the Standard of good Government; and a Pattern for all just Ministers to follow.
Thus, gentle Reader, have I, at the Expence of these poor Brains, crack’d this thick Shell, and given thee the Kernel. If any should object, and say this Exposition is a Contradiction to the D—n’s Principles; I assure such Objector, that the D—n is an errant Whig by Education, and Choice: He may indeed cajole the Tories
with a Belief that he is of their Party; but it is all a Joke, he is a Whig, and I know him to be so; Nay more, I can prove it, and defy him to contradict me; did he not just after his Arrival and Promotion in Ireland, writing to one of his intimate Friends in London, conclude his Letter in this Manner?