Inq. I’m the man that takes the census.
Mrs. T. If you was a man in your senses you wouldn’t ask such impertinent questions.
Inq. Don’t be offended, old lady, but answer my questions as I ask them.
Mrs. T. “Answer a fool according to his folly!”—you know what the Scripture says. Old lady, indeed!
Inq. Beg your pardon, madam; but I don’t care about hearing Scripture just at this moment I’m bound to go according to law and not according to gospel.
Mrs. T. I should think you went neither according to law nor gospel. What business is it to you to inquire into folks’ affairs, Mr. Thingumbob?
Inq. The law makes it my business, good woman, and if you don’t want to expose yourself to its penalties, you must answer my questions.
Mrs. T. Oh, it’s the law, is it? That alters the case. But I should like to know what the law has to do with other people’s household matters?
Inq. Why, Congress made the law, and if it don’t please you, you must talk to them about it.
Mrs. T. Talk to a fiddle-stick! Why, Congress is a fool, and you’re another.