Skinner's Dress Suit

by Henry Irving Dodge

"She asked me what I meant."

"And what did you say?"

"I told her her husband would understand and I wanted him to know just how I felt about it."

"The devil you did," said Skinner.

True to his word, Skinner proceeded to keep a little book marked "Dress-Suit Account." He was probably the only man, he reflected, who had ever done such a thing, and he did it at first more as a joke than anything else. But he found that the "Dress-Suit Account" developed serious as well as humorous possibilities. He first entered carefully, item by item, the cost of the dress suit and its accessories.

Dress-Suit Account
Debit	Credit
Dress suit ......... $90.00 Dress shirt ........ 4.00 Tie ................ .50 Collar ............. .25 Shoes .............. 6.00 Gloves ............. 1.50 Studs and cuff-links 4.00 Hat ................ 6.00 Overcoat ........... 40.00 Hose ............... .50 Garters ............ .50 Underwear .......... 8.00 Monocle chain ...... 1.50 -------- Total .............. $162.75

To that he added the cost of Honey's outfit:

Debit	Credit
Gown ............... $100.00 Underwear .......... 10.00 Hose ............... 3.00 Corset ............. 15.00 Slippers ........... 10.00 Wrap ............... 50.00 Gloves ............. 4.00 -------- Total .............. $192.00 Explanatory comment: Honey's outfit not directly descended from, but collater- ally related to "Dress-Suit Account"—an inevitable expenditure.

Skinner noted that everything was on the debit side until the night of the First Presbyterian reception. Then he put down:—

Dress-Suit Account
Debit	Credit
	Beginning of social education.