"It is settled then," continued the War Lord. "On your part, bigger and faster boats than the English; on my part, I promise to advise you of the date of the outbreak of hostilities long enough beforehand to save your vessels for the Fatherland. Even if circumstances decree their internment en masse, Germany will be the gainer in the end, when both our navy and our merchant marine remain unbroken."
Ballin was retreating backwards toward the door, when the War Lord recalled him. "I am dickering with Wilhelmina about Curaçao for a coaling station, and"—banteringly—"if you could stir up war between the Netherlands and some other colonial power I would be very much obliged. We got the coaling station in the Red Sea through our pro-Boer sympathies. Curaçao would make an excellent apéritif after getting over Dutch troubles."
"The United States would object."
"Of course, but there are some twenty-six millions of Germans in America, every mother's son of them fighting-mad for me—part of my invisible army and almost as important as the other. The Germans in America have an immense vote-swaying power; they control Washington to a large extent, and some of the State Legislatures absolutely. And, as you know, each American State is sovereign. Suppose I would threaten to decree secession for the States between New York and Seattle, taking in New York, Ohio, Illinois, Wisconsin, Indiana, Missouri, etc. etc., where would Washington be? Would Roosevelt risk Civil War because I want a place to coal my ships not exactly five thousand miles from the Panama Canal?
"I tell you, my men controlling a large portion of the American Press won't let him. And, by the way, Ballin, the Hapag, the Lloyd, Woermann, etc., will have to give more extensive support to my German Press in America than is done now. Die Staats Zeitungs, the Herolds, and whatever-they-call-them can't live on wind. Ridder is a rapacious cuss and a Jesuit besides; but my Washington bureau tells me that his complaints are not altogether groundless. As my Germans become more and more Americanised, the German papers' circulations are dwindling, and likewise slumps the advertising. For this we must make up. German shipping and the industries engaged in international trade must support the German Press in New York, Chicago, Milwaukee, St. Louis, Kansas City and the minor towns, as my Government supports the Norddeutsche Allgemeine and Krupp his Neueste Nachrichten.
"By the way," he added, grabbing a "Bismarck pencil" suspended from a wire and scribbling on his calendar block, "I will have to tell Krupp, Loewe and the rest of the ammunition hogs to loosen up on those German papers in America. Podbielski shall see them about it. Of course he is no stockholder, but his dear Emma is." (The War Lord referred to the scandals connecting a German general with subserviency to army purveyors to the extent of awarding contracts exclusively to firms in which he was financially interested.)
"It might serve the Hapag and 'meine Wenigkeit' (literally my inferiority, meaning your humble servant) if specifically informed respecting the invisible army Your Majesty was graciously pleased to allude to," bowed Herr Ballin.
"In the States," explained the War Lord, "my volunteers are mostly full-fledged citizens—universal suffrage, otherwise a stench in my nostrils, is working overtime for the German Cause there—but in the rest of the world merchant-princes, manufacturers, trade agents and skilled workmen do yeoman duty for me and the Fatherland. Of course we have a lot of adherents in England—'naturalised' they call them. Funny term! I hold that it would be most unnatural for a German to embrace another nationality, especially the English."
"Whenever you hear of troubles in Ireland, put it down to my invisible army. That same army has before this fomented labour troubles in Russia, and it never sleeps in France, particularly not in Paris."
And, lowering his voice, the War Lord talked of invisible forces building concrete gun-platforms along the French and Belgian frontiers—"foundations for manufacturing plants," he added sarcastically.