"'Yes, sir!' says she, impressed by my manners.
"'Well, then, madam,' says I, 'if you'll excuse my onprofessional language, I'll say that that's a low-down, Scandahoovian outrage.'
"'Now,' says she, eager, 'that's just what I think.'
"'Madam,' says I, bowin', 'I'm enchanted to see such a spirit—I'll think kindly of turnips from this day on. Let us prescribe for ourselves once more—the directions say take one every three minutes until you feel better. Besides, you got to help me, and you'll need your strength. My duties demand that I leave here by the night freight, but before that——' And I give her her directions. She jumped up and hustled out, as young as ever she was.
"Then I went up to the telegrapher. 'Where can I buy some toys and truck, to come out on Number Three?' says I.
"He didn't pay no attention.
"I reached in and took him gently by the hair, drawin' him part way through his cubby-hole so's he could hear plain.
"'My young friend,' says I, 'is it any part of your notion that I grew up on cabbages? Does it please your youthful fancy to picture me picketed out to grass, and chewin' my cud on a sunny slope?'
"'Ow!' says he. 'Leggo m' hair!'
"'You are now in the hands of E. G. W. Scraggs,' says I, 'an honor which I shall give you cause to appreciate if you don't lend me your ears to what I say. Do you think you can hear me now?'