After which, kissing his cousins' hands, he rushed out like a stone whirled from a sling, for he was in a great hurry.
On the way he grew grave and even gloomy at the thought that the moment for his decisive interview with his mother was approaching.
He found her in the hotel, where she awaited him in her own room. The sight of his mother's face, serene and filled with an unusual kind of sweetness, gave him, for the time being, encouragement, but at the same time he thought that gentle persuasion, entreaties, and perhaps tears, would be heavier to bear than anger--and he asked in an uncertain voice:
"Did Mamma read her letter?"
"I did," she answered, "but even before that I learned almost everything from Zosia, whom Miss Anney herself begged not to conceal anything from me."
"Gronski told me that Mamma became angry at Zosia?"
"Yes, that is so, but that can be rectified. Now I want above all things to talk with you sincerely."
So Ladislaus began to narrate how in the first moments he was struck as if by a thunderbolt and how he could not reconcile himself to the thought that Hanka and Miss Anney were one and the same person. He confessed his vacillation, his doubts, suspicions, and the pain, which pierced him; and the internal strife and accounting with his conscience and everything through which he passed. But only after reading her letter, did he perceive that this pain had its origin in his love for her and that the struggle was a struggle with his own heart and happiness; then he ceased to waver; he could not imagine happiness otherwise than with that most precious being in the world, and without her he did not desire it.
After which he said that when he became acquainted with her at Jastrzeb, as Miss Anney, from almost the first moment he was attracted to her by some incomprehensible force and she engrossed all his thoughts. He, of course, esteemed Zosia Otocka highly, and Marynia he regarded as a bright phenomenon. But admiration and love are two different things. Besides, he did not owe anything either to Zosia or to Marynia. They were kind while he was wounded and that was all. But to Miss Anney he probably owed his life, and he remembered that she for his sake placed herself in peril. With what could he repay her for that, and how could he make reparation for the former wrong, committed while she was still almost a child? Who was the worthier of the two? Was it he, who forgot and lived from day to day an easy, thoughtless, and spiritually slothful life, or she whom no new attachments could reconcile to their separation and who ennobled her mind and heart through suffering, yearning, and labor? "I scarcely dare to believe. Mother," said he, "that she not only absolves my injury, but has not ceased to love me. Perhaps it happened thus, because it was I who, for the first time in her life opened for her the doors to the world of happiness, but undoubtedly it was because hers is a totally exceptional nature. Yes, Mother! She is one of those who, in a pristine state even at the time when they are unable to realize things, possess that noble instinct, that sort of elevation of feeling that love ennobles indeed everything, but only when it is great, when it is for a whole lifetime; and those who love have such strength, such a depth of affection, that they are incapable of any other affection. But when such a one is found, then we can only thank God on our knees, and, in plain terms, my head is confused at the thought that for my transgression I meet with, not punishment, but fabulously good fortune. It may be that there are in the world more such women who can make a man happy, but I want to be happy only with this one; maybe there are others who ennoble and elevate everything about them, but I feel that through this one I will be better and better. Finally, this is a question not only of my happiness but also of my honor."
Here, folding his hands, he began to gaze into her eyes with a pleading look; after which he continued: