Contrast with Dr. Caliban’s wise and patriotic conduct upon this occasion the wickedness and folly of the Evening German in the matter of the Cabinet Crisis.
For some time the saner papers, which see the Empire as it is, had been issuing such placards as “He must go,” “Make room for Joseph” and other terse and definite indications of a new policy.
The Evening German had for several days headed its leading article, “Why don’t he resign?”
A member of the unscrupulous gang who ever lie in wait for whatever is innocent and enthusiastic called, just before press, upon the editor of the Evening German, passing himself off as the valet of the minister whose resignation was demanded. He produced a small sheet of MSS., and affirmed it to be the exact account of an interview between the minister and his doctor, which interview the valet had overheard, “concealed,” as he put it “behind an arras.” He said it would explain the situation thoroughly. He received no less than 25 guineas, and departed.
Now let the student read what follows, and ask himself by what madness a responsible editor came to print a thing so self-evidently absurd.
WHY HE DOES NOT RESIGN!
We have received upon an unimpeachable authority the verbatim account of an interview between him and his medical adviser, which we think thoroughly explains the present deadlock in Imperial affairs. We are assured upon oath that he was in bed when the doctor called just before noon yesterday, and that the following dialogue took place:—
Minister (in bed)—Good morning, Doctor, I am glad to see you. What can I do for you?... I mean, I am glad to see you. Pray excuse the inadvertence of my phrase, it is one that I have lately had to use not a little.
Doctor—Pray let me look at your tongue and feel your pulse. So. We are getting along nicely. At what hour were you thinking of rising?