What Anguish Really Is. ☚
The experiments described above, and hundreds of similar ones conducted by SPAL show that an unbelievable number of English words, regardless of their usual meanings, can be substituted quite satisfactorily for others. When all the words in a given passage of English have been so replaced, the passage keeps its original meaning, but all the words have acquired new ones. A word that has received a new meaning has become a wart, and when all the words in the passage have become warts, the passage is no longer English; it’s Anguish.
Are There Any Good Reasons to Study Anguish? ☚
This is not an altogether silly question, and it deserves the prompt and unequivocal answer any Anguish Languish enthusiast will give it.
“Watcher mane, ardor rainy gut raisins toe sturdy anguish?” he will say, and will probably give you an impressive list of them which will certainly include the following:
1. Anguish is fun.
You and your friends can make a game out of learning Anguish, and you’ll have fun developing your own style and observing each other’s efforts. How to begin will be explained later.
2. Anguish Languish means verbal economy.
If words can be made to do double, triple, or even quadruple duty, it is obvious that we don’t need so many of them. Wouldn’t it be a comfort to know that, in the event of some unpredictable disaster wiping out half of our English vocabulary, we could, if we had learned Anguish, get along nicely with what we had left?[3]