"Lizzie dear, I've been so frightened—of something else."
"Of what?"
"I'm going to have a child. I've known it for some time. At first I wasn't sure. Then I knew. I was frightened and miserable. Then, as with every day I seemed to grow fonder and fonder of Roddy I became glad about it. Then very happy——"
"Oh, Rachel dear, I'm so glad!"
"Yes. But now, with this, about Roddy it's all dreadful again. If he should turn on me now just when I've begun to care."
She sat up in bed, her eyes staring, her hands clutching the clothes.
"Lizzie, if it should come right!—if it should! Just think what a child would mean for him; he's so brave, lying there all day, making himself amused and interested. I watch him often and wonder where all that courage comes from. I couldn't have done it.... But now, if the child's a boy, he'll be able to put all his old strength and keenness into him—and the Place! Think what it will mean to him to have that!"
"And for you?" asked Lizzie.
"I believe it's what I've wanted. Oh! if only things are all right with Roddy, then I can start again and have some decent pride about it all. I've made such a mess of things so far."
They talked for a little. Then Rachel got up and dressed.