'Where do you think he'll have gone?' she asked.
'That we must find out from Sunde,' I said.
'Sunde?' Her face looked blank for a moment and then she stared. 'You mean the man that jumped overboard from the catcher-'
'Yes,' I said. 'That was Farnell.' I nodded to the body at my feet. 'This is Schreuder.'
'Then Farnell-' Curtis checked himself.
I nodded. 'Looks like it,' I said. 'Now let's put the body back and then we'll go and talk to Sunde.'
CHAPTER SEVEN
The Saeter Hut
The shock of discovering that the body was Schreuder's and that Farnell was alive seemed to leave Jill completely stunned. She stood quite still, with a dazed expression on her face, as we put the coffin back and filled in the grave. The frozen slabs of earth rattled on the thin pine lid with a hollow sound. We replaced the sods and the little wooden cross with Bernt Olsen's name on it and then went down to the boat. Nobody spoke as we rowed back to the ship. Occasionally I glanced at Jill seated on the thwart opposite me. Her face was set and expressionless. I wondered what was going on in her mind. That it had been a shock was understandable. But there was something in her eyes and in the set expression of her face that puzzled me. There should have been excitement and happiness. But there wasn't. Only that dazed look that stirred something deep inside me. It hurt me to see her like that.
That I think was the first intimation I had that I was in love with her. I didn't consciously realise it at the time. That came later. But I felt disturbed and unhappy. She was so tense and strained. She ought to have been happy — happy at the thought that he was alive. But she wasn't happy. I remembered the urgency in her when she had first met me in that Thames-side pub. She had wanted so much to get to Norway and see his grave. And now… I didn't know what to make of it. Schreuder had been murdered — and by Farnell. Was that what hurt her so? Or was it the knowledge that he would do anything — lie, cheat, desert, even murder, for the thing that had driven him all his life? I suddenly realised how little she could have meant to him. She was just a side show — a pleasurable moment in a man's hard struggle to achieve what he had set his heart on. There was that conversation we had had coming up the Sognefjord. What was it she had asked me? What makes a man throw away love for something a woman can't understand?