§ 357 The Position of a Young Man
A minor-league baseball manager received a letter from a young player who gave an unabridged and highly flattering account of the author’s ability to make good in any company. Also he declared he could hit ’em harder and higher and farther than Babe Ruth ever did. It so happened that the manager was very much in need of a utility player but the young man had neglected to say whether he was a pitcher, catcher, infielder or outfielder.
He answered the letter, inquiring what position the prospective phenomenon played.
A reply came back accompanied by a snapshot of a youth in uniform, crouched and apparently awaiting the arrival of a grounder.
“You can see by the inclosed photograph,” wrote the young man, “that I play in a stooping position, with one hand on each knee.”
§ 358 No Detail to Be Overlooked
It was the last night of the revival meeting. The evangelist was going strong. His subject was eternal damnation. With all the eloquence at his command, he urged the congregation to flee from the wrath to come.
“Ah, my friends,” he exclaimed, “on that last dread day there will be weeping, and wailing, and gnashing of teeth!”
In a rear pew stood up an elderly woman.
“Elder,” she said tremulously, “I ain’t got no teeth.”