“Pooh!” said Davis, in the most imperturbable tone, regaining his hold on Tom’s arm and drawing him into step again; “don’t fly out with a fellow for trying to befriend you. There are slow ways of getting on in the world, and quicker ones for those who can’t afford to wait, that’s all; and I thought you were in a hurry. If you agree, I’ll introduce you to as gentlemanly a set of fellows as you know, and I’ll warrant you a welcome, for the truth is we want one more, of just your measure too, to make our set complete. Don’t make up your mind in a hurry; it’s early yet. Meet me here again at nine o’clock.”
“But I tell you I wont,” began Tom. “I don’t want to hear any such—”
“Pooh!” interrupted Davis again; “what’s the use of toiling a dozen years under somebody’s thumb when you might make enough to stand on your own feet in as many months? The world owes us a living, anyhow, and I don’t see why handling a bit of paper skilfully isn’t quite as much the gentlemanly thing as measuring away with a yardstick half a lifetime. Just come up like a man, and I’ll be responsible for the rest.”
It was seven o’clock, and for an hour and a half Tom pushed drearily up and down the streets through a drizzling mist, but the fog lay thicker and darker in his own brain. What should he say; what should he do? He must do something, for he would rather die than have another year like the last. Rather die? Of course he would; but people don’t always die for the wishing, and who would there be to take his father’s place if he should?
These thoughts crowded and whirled, and then came Aleck’s words, those words spoken so long ago, but never forgotten, “Some One that always notices.”
“I can’t help it,” he cried; “I believe I’m desperate. I’ve tried to do my best all these years, and what’s the use? as Davis says. Oh, if I only had one friend that really cared for me that I could go to and tell everything! I should have, I suppose, if I was worth it, and Hal would have respected me if I’d been worth it; but he never did, and of course nobody else did, only they were kind enough to keep it out of sight.”
If Tom could only have seen Thorndyke at that moment, and known what he was thinking of as he sat at his desk, with papers pushed away and his eyes fixed somewhere a good way beyond, with a pained and troubled look!
“Hoosier general!” he was saying to himself; “I wonder what that means? Something that Tom winced under, that was plain enough. I don’t see how Fenimore finds it in his heart to worry him so, and I’m sure there’s more of it going on than Tom knows how to get along with. I wish I could do something to help him out of it. I wish I could get him over here; it would be such a comfort now that Aleck is out of the way so much! But he’s doing so well there, and he’s worked his way almost to the top of the ladder, I could never ask him. I heard Fenimore praising him to the rest of the firm the other day, and I don’t wonder.”
But Tom didn’t hear; he plodded up and down without knowing that he was tired, and that he had eaten not a mouthful since morning, and that the drizzling mist had penetrated and chilled him through. He was only thinking of the store and of the hour of going back, and that if he did not soon find some way of escape by which he could still hold on to his duty at home, he was afraid he should let go of it! Oh, why was he left so? Why could not his father have lived? The city bell struck eight, and the echo of Davis’ voice seemed to repeat his words.
“Come up like a man!”