"COMMUNION SABBATH, July 17, 1814.
"'Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory: receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls,' 1 Peter, 1:8, 9.
"I had requested to be brought to my Lord's banqueting-house, and to be feasted with love this day. I ate the bread and drank the wine, in the faith that I ate the flesh and drank the blood of the Son of man, and dwelt in him and he in me. Took a close view of my familiar friend Death, accompanied with the presence of my Saviour, his sensible presence. I cannot look at it without this; it is my only petition concerning it. I have had desires relative to certain circumstances, but they are nearly gone. It is my sincere desire that God may be glorified, and he knows best how and by what circumstances. I retain my one petition,
"Only to me thy countenance show,
I ask no more the Jordan through."
Thus she arose from her Master's table, was called to gird on her armor for a combat with the king of terrors, and came off more than conqueror, through Him who loved her.
On Monday she appeared in perfect health, and visited and gave religious instruction to the orphans in the asylum.
On Tuesday, the 19th of July, she complained of not feeling well, and kept her room; on Thursday her disorder proved to be a cholera-morbus, and her children sent for a physician. She thought this attack was slighter than in former seasons. On Saturday, however, she requested that Mrs. Chrystie might be sent for; this alarmed Mrs. B——, knowing there existed an understanding between those two friends, that one should attend the dying-bed of the other, Mrs. Chrystie was a very dear friend of Mrs. Graham. For upwards of twenty-four years they had loved each other, feeling reciprocal sympathy in their joys and their sorrows; the hope of faith was the consolation of both, and oftentimes it had been their delightful employment to interchange their expressions of affection towards Him whom having not seen, they loved, and in whom, though they saw him not, yet believing on him, they rejoiced with joy unspeakable and full of glory. On Mrs. Chrystie's entering the chamber of her friend, Mrs. Graham welcomed her with a sweet expressive smile, seeming to say, "I am going to get the start of you, I am called home before you; it will be your office to fulfil our engagement." When she sat by her bedside, Mrs. Graham said, "Your face is very pleasant to me, my friend."
During Saturday night, a lethargy appeared to be overpowering her frame. On Sabbath morning she was disposed to constant slumber; observing Mr. B—— looking at her with agitation, she was roused from her heaviness, and stretching her arms towards him and embracing him, she said, "My dear, dear son, I am going to leave you; I am going to my Saviour." "I know," he replied, "that when you do go from us, it will be to the Saviour; but, my dear mother, it may not be the Lord's time now to call you to himself." "Yes," said she, "now is the time; and Oh, I could weep for sin." Her words were accompanied with her tears. "Have you any doubts, then, my dear friend?" asked Mrs. Chrystie. "Oh no," replied Mrs. Graham; and looking at Mr. and Mrs. B—— as they wept, "My dear children, I have no more doubt of going to my Saviour, than if I were already in his arms; my guilt is all transferred; he has cancelled all I owed. Yet I could weep for sins against so good a God: it seems to me as if there must be weeping even in heaven for sin."
After this she entered into conversation with her friends, mentioning portions of scripture and favorite hymns which had been subjects of much comfort and joy to her. Some of these she had transcribed into a little book, calling them her "victuals" prepared for crossing over Jordan; she committed them to memory, and often called them to remembrance as her songs in the night when sleep had deserted her. She then got Mr. B—— to read to her some of these portions, especially the eighty-second hymn of Newton's third book:
"Let us love, and sing, and wonder;
Let us praise the Saviour's name:
He has hushed the law's loud thunder,
He has quenched mount Sinai's flame:
He has washed us with his blood,
He has brought us nigh to God," etc.