Now although such a sequence of ideas in the Unconscious may lead to contempt of the mother, it has not deprived her of her original power of attracting love and admiration; it The dissociation of sexual attractiveness and esteem leads rather to a mental splitting up of these original attractive attributes, the more purely and directly sexual ones being separated from the other characteristics in virtue of which she stands as an example of all that is morally desirable in womanhood. These two different aspects of the mother attributes are then in later life sought and found in different individuals—the sexual attributes in prostitutes or in women of inferior morality, education, intelligence or social station; the other attributes—objects of tender love and admiration—in women of a higher standing, towards whom however no physically sexual attraction can be felt.
This dissociation of purely sexual attraction from tenderness, esteem and the other components of fully developed love, is, The importance of this dissociation if we take account of its presence in minor as well as in major degrees, of such frequent occurrence, that it has been regarded by some as a normal feature of the sex impulse in the human male. It is at the same time a feature which cannot but be productive of harm in a monogamous society, so that if Freud's explanation of its origin should prove to be one that is at all generally valid, this aberrant process of development must be regarded as one that entails very serious consequences of an ethical and sociological as well as of a psychological nature, and one therefore to whose incidence, genesis, growth and history a little further consideration may perhaps not unprofitably be devoted here.
The dissociation between the more purely sexual constituents Influences in later life which are liable to reinforce it of love and the elements of esteem, reverence and tenderness which is originally brought about in the manner indicated by Freud, probably owes much of its prevalence and importance in later life to the fact that, once established, it is very apt to be strengthened and maintained by certain of the conditions under which the development of a youth's sexual knowledge is liable to occur. Among the most important of these conditions are the two following:
(1) The first actual experience of acute sensory pleasure of Masturbation a sexual kind about the time of puberty is very frequently associated with the act of masturbation, which in its turn is often accompanied by visual phantasies in which the rôle of sexual partner is played by women or girls known to the boy. As masturbation itself is usually carried on in the face of considerable psychic opposition, being looked upon as sordid, disgusting or injurious to health, there is not unnaturally a reluctance to bring into connection with this manifestation of the sexual impulse any woman or girl who is sincerely and profoundly loved, esteemed or honoured; those introduced into the masturbation phantasies being therefore such who, while not devoid of superficial sexual attractiveness, nevertheless display some real or supposed inferiority (as regards beauty, virtue, social standing or what not), as a result of which they make no appeal to the boy's sense of higher moral values. Through frequent repetition of this process, women of an inferior type come to be firmly associated with the more directly sexual aspects of love, from which women who are looked upon with tenderness or veneration are correspondingly dissociated, lest these dear objects of affection should be sullied by being brought into contact with what the boy regards as dishonourable, lewd or filthy[130].
(2) At a later stage of development the original dissociation Prostitution thus reinforced is frequently still further strengthened by the association (in thought or deed or both) of sexual practices with prostitutes—a class of women whom the youth is himself prepared to condemn because of the already existing connection in his mind between inferiority and sex, and as regards whose condemnation from the moral point of view he, as a rule, finds ample corroboration in the opinions expressed or implied by those around him.
The moral degradation of the sexual object thus receives Effect of the dissociation on marriage its final confirmation, and when later in marriage the young man endeavours to unite esteem and tenderness with sexual passion, he may find that the dissociation between these elements of love has grown too wide and fundamental to be overcome, so that one or other of these requisites of a complete and happy married life has necessarily to be sacrificed. As a result of this, a man may marry a woman whom he is prepared indeed to cherish, honour and esteem, but towards whom (for this very reason) he feels himself but little attracted in a purely sexual sense; in which case he will often be tempted after a while to seek a more complete degree of sexual satisfaction elsewhere. Or else, should the directly sexual trends prevail, he may select a partner who is inferior to him in some important intellectual, moral or social respect, thus paving the way for a married life in which many of his more sublimated tendencies, desires and aspirations are doomed to suffer permanent lack of gratification[131].
There can be little doubt that women are, on the whole, The liability of women to a corresponding dissociation less liable to suffer from this kind of dissociation than are men. With women the directly sexual elements of love are more frequently aroused together with the elements of tenderness and esteem, than is the case with men. Thus many women experience sexual desire or gratification only in relation to men to whom they are bound also by feelings of deep affection, admiration or respect. This difference between the sexes is perhaps to some extent a constitutional one, the elements in question being by nature more intimately fused and integrated in one sex than in the other[132]. Some part of the difference is however due, beyond all reasonable doubt, to environmental and educational factors.
Of the three principal factors we have enumerated as liable to bring about a high degree of dissociation between sexual attraction and esteem in men, it seems probable that the first—that due to the child's contempt for the (otherwise) loved parent for yielding to the sexual advances of the hated parent—is almost if not quite as potent with women as with men. The subsequent reinforcement of the dissociation by the two remaining factors is however to a considerable extent inoperative with women. The influence of masturbation is in nearly all respects less marked in women than in men, partly perhaps because at the important age, at or about the time of puberty, the practice is less frequent with girls than with boys, but principally because for a variety of reasons it meets with less violent psychic opposition, arouses less violent moral conflicts and is to a much lesser extent liable to become the cause of self-contempt or self-reproach[133]. Nor again is the association of sexual activity with prostitution (although the act of prostitution itself may be regarded with considerable repulsion) so deeply ingrained in women as in men.
In spite, however, of the lesser operation of these factors in the case of women and in spite of any possible closer connection (through innate organization) of the elements of the love impulse which are liable to dissociation, it is nevertheless true that a very considerable number of women do suffer from some degree of this dissociation[134].
Such women will often be attracted to two kinds of men—one Manifestations of the dissociation in women of which (frequently physically inferior) may arouse sympathy, respect, devotion or tenderness, while the other (frequently of a morally, socially or intellectually inferior type, but often physically superior[135]) will alone be capable of arousing sexual desire. Quite often the attraction to an inferior person is combined with the desire for clandestinity to which we referred above; the whole complex finding its most satisfying and appropriate expression in a furtive love affair of such a kind as to be contrary to the moral or social standards of the woman's upbringing and environment. It is obvious that the difficulties which bar the way to a completely successful marriage for such women are but little if at all inferior to those existing in the case of men who suffer from a corresponding condition of dissociation[136].