Suburban Residences, and How to Circumvent Them

by J. E. Panton

Where a house fails to be a real success, be sure it is because some detail has been forgotten, and under these circumstances let no one rest until it is remembered and carried out. And here I am sure, is a great opening for an artistic woman with a keen eye for effect—if only she could persuade some of our larger upholsterers to employ her—for such a woman is badly wanted to go round every newly-furnished house, and note down as she goes the small things which will invariably escape the best male eye in the world, and even the eye of the best decorator. She will, pocket-book in hand, note the differences in the paint, which always occur where Aspinall is not used, the bolt or knob forgotten there, the curtain placed in the wrong room, the portière that has been left out, and she will finally put the last touches which none but a woman can, and which in some mysterious manner turn a house into the home it can always be made by anyone who really and truly understands the science. But nothing must be passed over; no doubt it takes time and thought to obtain perfection, still both are to be had, ay, even in the shoddy villa of the suburbs. But there must be no temporising, no ‘it doesn’t matter, it’s only for a short time.’ Neither must draughty doors and windows be allowed to remain; if so, pneumonia will come to stay, chronic colds will be our portion, and we shall be miserable from the moment we enter the house until we pass out of it in search of another, where we shall only once more meet with a similar fate; for the ‘move on, please!’ of the policeman is not worse or more constant than the silent hint given by the suburban villa that it is not in any way a suitable place of residence for us and ours, if we have not really circumvented its idiosyncrasies and made the very best of an absolutely bad job. Remember too, the great help a screen is in every bedroom which is big enough to have one without over-crowding, that one can easily have too many pictures and ornaments which encourage dust and enrage the housemaid, and that even the soiled linen basket should be chosen carefully. In these happy days, cheap things are quite as prettily designed as expensive ones, and if we take our time, know our shops and our own minds, and set to work carefully, there is nothing to prevent us nowadays from having a quite perfect house, and that without any undue expenditure of money or time.

CHAPTER IX
DRESSING-ROOMS AND BATHROOMS

Lucky indeed is that suburban householder who finds himself the proud possessor of one or more dressing-rooms beside the orthodox bathroom, which, thanks to the march of the ages, is now to be found in the quite small houses which are only meant for such a humble individual as the ordinary city clerk. As a rule, there will be a dressing-room leading out of the ‘best’ bedroom, and if this need not be used as described in the chapter on nurseries, it were well to contemplate it and consider carefully if it cannot serve the purpose of a small private retreat for the house-mistress, should the ‘third room’ have to be devoted to the maids, or to the master, or even to schoolroom purposes. For it is absolutely necessary that she should have such a retreat; and if the bathroom be available for the husband as indeed it should always be in a little house, where visitors are the exception and not the rule, there can be no reason why the dressing-room should not be so arranged that the wife could use it in the daytime, ay, and even see her more intimate friends there, if she cares to do so. I have twice had houses which have had fireless dressing-rooms, and these were, of course, very difficult to deal with, even when the rooms were used as dressing-rooms only, and I do not quite know what I should have done had I not had other rooms available for myself. Yet as both dressing-rooms were on the outside of the house, fire-places or stoves could have been placed there, and, of course, ought to have been erected at once. But the bathroom in each case was used for a dressing-room, and the hot water always kept at a proper state of warmth even in the coldest weather; though in both cases fire-places were available had it been necessary to have greater heat. But when frost appeared we were always ready for it; we kept gas and fires burning whenever pipes were likely to freeze, and as all the outside pipes were properly protected, I have never had a pipe burst myself and have never experienced in my own person the miseries I have had so graphically described to me by sufferers from this most disagreeable consequence of carelessness and the improper manner in which pipes are fixed and the supply pipes managed by the ordinary water company.

But first let us consider how the dressing-room can be arranged should it be necessary to use it during the day as a species of sitting-room or boudoir for the mistress of the house. Of course all dressing-rooms should be painted and decorated to match, or else to harmonise with the bedrooms to which they are attached, but I think a harmony rather than an exact copy should be the aim of whoever wishes to use this room as a boudoir for some hours at least during the day. Suppose, for example, we have a very sunny bedroom, and we have selected a soft green paper, such as Smee’s ‘green ash,’ and a rose-frieze for it, in that case we could have a pale pink paper in the dressing-room above a matting, or Japanese leather dado in green and gold, with all real ivory paint, and the furniture here could be in the stained green wood which I always admire so much, and of which it seems impossible to tire. We could have the green ‘Isis’ matting and rugs on the floor, and the curtains could be of sage-green serge; this would make a charming room, and while it would not slavishly copy, neither would it flatly contradict the scheme of colour in the bedroom.

In the same way a blue bedroom could have a yellow dressing-room attached, and this could be managed by selecting some real yellow paper, and placing it above either a gold-and-brown Japanese leather dado, or, yet again, above a matting dado, remembering that the matting used for this purpose must never under any circumstances have the smallest pattern on it; if it have, the look of the wall will be spoiled and the decorations will be anything but a real success. I am compelled to impress this fact upon my readers, because I have often seen a house spoiled simply because a matting dado to the room meant to the owner merely a dado made of matting; and she had not realised that chessboard patterns or large diamonds are entirely out of place in this situation. The only matting that should be used is the thin plain string-coloured kind made on purpose, and which is sold at Shoolbred’s, Oetzmann’s, and sometimes at Wallace’s for 10½d. a yard; sometimes Treloar sells it for something less in a roll of 42 yards, but this matting is essentially what the French call ‘a vende d’occasion,’ and has often to be really looked for until the right thing is found. If by the way a red and cream paper is put above a matting dado, and red paint is required to be used, a matting should be found which has a red thread running through it in an irregular way; it must not on any account have a set or formal pattern on it, or it will not be the success that it deserves to be.

Yet another hint, on no account should the dado or frieze rail be in the least degree heavy, the lighter it is the better, and I do not care for it to be more than an inch, or at most an inch and a half in depth. A wider rail always brings itself far too prominently before us, and attracts undue attention, while the lighter the rail is the cheaper will it be; and once more I say use ‘goehring,’ and then matters will not fail to be all that they ought to be. If the paper is yellow and the dado is brown and yellow, the paint can be brown also, while the curtains can be blue, as can the carpet, or else plain, patternless matting can be used, and the usual rugs.

If a blue square carpet is preferred, and lucky is she whose house contains a dressing-room large enough for this, the ‘Dunelm’ carpet is the best to have. It is made in most excellent colourings, is all wool, and very thick, and, moreover, is very inexpensive considering its admirable qualities. But as a rule a dressing-room resembles a tube or part of a hall more than a room, and as such we must think about it. It is generally long and narrow, and has a window in the most awkward situation, with, maybe, the door opposite; while the fireplace, if fire-place there be, is about a foot to the left or right of the door, and admirably situated for anyone who may be on the look out for a cold. This absurd situation can often be successfully treated by making the door open into the room on the fire side, thus making the door itself act as a species of screen to whoever may be sitting in the room. This alteration gives at once a place for a box-ottoman or an arm-chair, or one of Hewetson’s admirable ‘courting settees,’ which can be placed with one end against the wall, standing straight out into the room. The high back of this settee shields anyone using it from draughts, and these are further to be combated by hanging portières over the door, inside and out, which will complete the task, already satisfactorily commenced, by a judicious use of ‘Slater’s patent.’

Then we have to consider very seriously how to arrange for the raiment that all men collect in such astounding quantities, and from which it is so desperately hard to part them, try how one will to get possession of venerable garments, which are of no possible use to the owners, but which would be of immense service to many unfortunates who all too often have not only no decent clothes, but do not possess any at all. This is however a vice all men develop sooner or later, and as they are made absolutely miserable by casting from them the oldest rag they may have, it is best in extreme cases to let them have their foolish way, taking care the moth does not enter into possession, and at the same time ensuring that they have not over-much space in which to keep their miserly delights. In a ‘combination’ room all shirts and underclothes can be kept in a charming piece of furniture Liberty sells, and which looks like a cabinet mounted on a couple of good deep drawers. It is made in plain white wood, clamped and ornamented with beaten iron and is very inexpensive indeed. In the deep drawers can be kept shirts and trousers, while there are plenty of smaller drawers in the cabinet part for socks, ties, handkerchiefs and other garments; coats being kept in a second cabinet, or else in a box-ottoman, or hung up behind the curtains of Wallace’s ‘P. T. C.’ wardrobe, which can be erected in any corner of the room and has nothing at all of the bedroom about its appearance.

I have seen a most admirable piece of furniture at Oetzmann’s, which he calls a desk washing-stand, and which would really be invaluable for such a room as this. When closed it is exactly like a desk with a flat top, and could be used as such in the day time most conveniently, but the top must not be laden with odds-and-ends, books, paperboxes or similar encumbrances. These should all be in one of Shoolbred’s capital little cupboard tables; another of these, by the way, being procured for the boots and shoes in wear. These cupboards would hold three or four pairs of each, as they have a division-shelf inside, and though I know starvation is suggested to the ordinary male, to whom such small provision of foot-gear is indeed nothing short of pauperism, I venture to suggest that it is sufficient for every day, and that the rest of the stock can live in a proper boot cupboard in some other locality, which can easily be found if the house-mistress is clever and able to see at once the utmost capacity of the special rooms which are available for such a purpose. Indeed, a properly-made boot-cupboard can stand on one side of quite a narrow passage, and would never be noticed; for it could be either the proper one Wallace makes on purpose for boots, or else be formed merely