The dumb-waiter, cured by what would make most people speechless (a proof of the truth of homœopathy), flew in all directions, shouting “Yessir, yessir!” The wooden soldiers pulled themselves together for a moment to salute an officer who was passing, which they did with the wrong hand, and then sped on in more fragments than before. The grate party was smashed so small that even his dogs did not know him; the nigger’s nether limbs went off down the street by themselves, and were at once apprehended as black-legs by the police, while the rest of him formed a kind of Black’s Atlas upon the pavement. The snob, as was natural, disappeared in any number of vulgar fractions.
HEAVY BACKING.
The Blunderbus ran back at a great pace for a mile, butting over two Papal bulls, sending spinning mules without number, and ended by knocking ten feet out of a square yard, in which a regiment of soldiers was being drilled.
SUCH A STATE.
Our trio, who had been rather alarmed during their ride, jumped off the gun the moment it stopped, and, as boys will always do, ran off to look at the soldiers. On getting near they were surprised to see that each man had a nigger lady beside him. While they were wondering what this could mean, the Colonel, who wore a shell jacket, and had a husky voice, rode up on a clothes-horse, and handed Norval a parade state, which was as follows:—
| Twoty-tenth Boshshire Ruffs, 37th Marchuary 7718. | |||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Present with Leave. | Present without Leave. | Absent in Mind. | Absent in Body. | Tea Tottles. | |
| Kernels, | 0 | 1½ | 1½ | 0 | |
| Ragers, | 0 | 2¾ | 2 | ¾ | |
| Catpins, | 0 | 7.09 | 5 | 2.09 | |
| Bluelandlords, | 0 | 10 | 10 | 0 | |
| Scar Gents, | 0 | 15.4 | 0 | 15.4 | |
| Noodlers, | 0 | 11 | 11 | 0 | |
| Fank and Rile, | 0 | 550.7 | 550.7 | 0 | |
| T Tottles, | Add | them up | for your | self. | |
| A. NUTT, Kernel of the Core. | |||||
BROWN BESSIES.
“How is it,” said practical Jaques, who observed that the men had only wooden guns, “that your men have no rifles?”