(The KING and QUEEN are attired like their portraits on playing cards, who are the only royalties CINDERELLA has seen, and they advance grandly to their rocking chairs, looking as if they thought the whole public was dirt, but not so much despised dirt as dirt with good points. LORD TIMES fixes them with his eye, and the KING hastily crosses and shakes hands with him.)
O yes, O yes, make way everyone, except the King, and Queen, and Lord Times, for His Highness Prince Hard-to-Please.
(The heir apparent comes, preceded by trumpeters. His dress may a little resemble that of the extraordinary youth seen by Cinderella in her only pantomime, but what quite takes our breath away is his likeness to our POLICEMAN. If the ball had taken place a night earlier it may be hazarded that the PRINCE would have presented quite a different face. It is as if CINDERELLA’S views of his personality had undergone some unaccountable change, confusing even to herself, and for a moment the whole scene rocks, the street lamps wink, and odd shadows stalk among the courtiers, shadows of MR. BODIE, MARION, and the party in an unfinished coat, who have surely no right to be here. This is only momentarily; then the palace steadies itself again.
The KING rises, and in stately manner addresses his guests in the words Cinderella conceives to be proper to his royal mouth. As he stands waiting superbly for the applause to cease, he holds on to a strap hanging conveniently above his head. To Cinderella strap-hanging on the Underground has been a rare and romantic privilege.)
KING. My loyal subjects, all ’ail! I am as proud of you as you are of me. It gives me and my good lady much pleasure to see you ’ere by special invite, feasting at our expense. There is a paper bag for each, containing two sandwiches, buttered on both sides, a piece of cake, a hard-boiled egg, and an orange or a banana.
(The cheers of the delighted courtiers gratify him, but the vulgar children over his head continue their rub-a-dub on the parapet until he glares up at them. Even then they continue.)
Ladies and Gents all, pleasant though it is to fill up with good victuals, that is not the chief object of this royal invite. We are ’ere for a solemn purpose, namely, to find a mate for our noble son. All the beauties are waiting in the lobby: no wonder he is excited.
(All look at the PRINCE, who is rocking and yawning.)
He will presently wake up; but first I want to say—(here he becomes conscious of LORD TIMES). What is it?
LORD TIMES. Less talk.